Lambchop Rides!

It's Not A Choice

2009-01-20T10:07:00.000-08:00

I'm fed up with people who claim that sexual orientation is a "lifestyle" or a "choice." I'm going to tell you what I think about this, but first I need to ramble a bit about my own upbringing; I feel that I've got some unusual insight because of my background.

First of all, my mother didn't hold me as a baby, and my father was too busy as an undergraduate at a prestigious university to do much more than to mostly attend to my physical needs. I went to live with normal parents when I was about 30 months old, but in terms of emotional and cognitive development, child psychologists say this period is crucial.

I really do recall climbing on the kitchen counter, fetching a jar of baby food, and then carefully peering into the silverware drawer to find a spoon. I'm told that I would then carry the jar and spoon into another room and find an adult to feed me, because--of course--my hands had neither the strength nor the dexterity to deal with opening the jar or spooning the food out. (Ever since I've had my own place to live I've been obsessive about keeping knives in a separate drawer. I think it's because I was fearful when I was looking for that spoon.)

I'm not sharing this because I need your sympathy; I think I've turned out all right (mostly) in spite of this...setback. However, this early experience has made me different. In particular, social interaction has always been hard for me. I like to think of it as being on the outside looking in. As a child and an adolescent, I was unable to participate in the social niceties with my peers. As an adult, I can do a pretty good job of faking it, but it will never be natural for me.

Another quirk of my upbringing is that I do remember things from as early as two years of age. If you were to believe child psychologists, they'd say that such a thing is highly unlikely. I understand that, but please...these same psychologists say that we all develop different parts of our brain at different speeds and rates, so don't discount my experience. As for what I remember...well, let's say that a two year old's interests and concerns are pretty basic, so most of what happened at that age has been flushed from the wetware FIFO buffer.

So, anyway, here's my first point: I have been interested in girls ever since I knew there was a difference from boys (and possibly even earlier, but how would I be able to recognize that?), which was somewhere around the age of three or four. This was not a choice. This was not something I was taught. This is something that, for me, is completely innate.

Moving on to high school and college, a lot of people just assumed I was gay. I think this is a direct result of the "outside looking in", where I was not skilled enough to mimic the social interplay that my peers engaged in. (I think this is why drag queens are so much fun: as outsiders, they are sensitized to the social interplay and have learned to mimic and exaggerate it, much to our amusement.) I ended up with a lot of female friends, since I didn't emit the correct social signals when I was interested in them. I remember a class at Caltech of 25 students, including 5 women, who all chose to sit next to me in every class. I didn't understand why they did that at the time, but in hindsight I'm pretty sure it was because I was nice without emitting the horny-guy-hitting-on-you signal that most men give off literally without conscious effort. (The irony is exquisite; I thought being nice was the right way to win the girls. That works with adult women but is not a successful strategy with girls in their teens and twenties.)

It kinda follows with all of this that I got asked out by several gay men. (Following the "nice" theme, these men were a heck of a lot nicer to me than it seems that straight men were with the women they were trying to pick up. I still wonder if that's the reason so many normal straight men are put off by the idea of gay men hitting on them: they're afraid of being treated the way that most straight women are treated.)

My circle of gay friends and acquaintances has been fairly large over the years as well. Again, part of it is the social misfits hanging out together, but on the other hand, they didn't expect me to talk about football and smash beer cans on my forehead. Heck, one of my best friends in undergraduate school was an ex-Marine who outweighed me by about 20% and enjoyed going out to bars to pick fights with the rednecks. Dear Blanche--I'm sure that at the time she would have worn the moniker "diesel dyke" with pride.

The point I want to make is that except for a very small handful, these people are just plain folks like you and me. They didn't just decide that it would be A Cool Thing to choose something that is regarded with disgust, dismay, and outright disaprobation by most people. If they were a bit strange, well, I think their social adjustment problems were more likely a consequence of their sexual orientation, not a cause.

Let's think about that last part for a moment. This is the new idea that's been ringing around my head for the last few months. Now, I really don't have an appreciation for men, so for the purposes of a thought experiment, I've tried to consider how it would be if I had my current sexual orientation but I was born female....

I'm sure that as a young girl, I would have just gone with the flow. All of my girlfriends think the movie stars are dreamy hunks...oh, okay, I guess they're all right. (I think of Rita Mae Brown in Rubyfruit Jungle, who always liked the leading ladies. I'm inclined to believe that I wouldn't have been as certain.)

In high school and college, I'm sure I would have had one or more relationships with men. Nice men. Good looking men. However, at some point, my visceral enthusiasm for women would finally become undeniable.

Can you imagine the kind of personal courage it takes someone to admit to themselves that no, they're not like everyone else? The basic assumption we all have as kids is that we all are having, basically, the same experience. What a sinking feeling, to one day realize that no, I can't be like the other girls.

Then comes the anguish, soul searching, and, finally emotional fortitude to say, "this is not for me, regardless of what other people may think." To have to try to accept the dreadful undeniable fact that I am a "queer."

The next step seems almost unthinkable: to act on that undeniable preference, and to even acknowledge it to family and friends? No wonder so many gays and lesbians stay "in the closet", or only "come out" much later in life. That's a heavy burden to put on an adolescent or young adult.

So--back to this notion that it's a "choice." (Who the hell would choose such a thing, given the slightest opportunity to avoid it?) If you are one of the few people for whom this really is a choice, then you're saying you have a significant attraction to your own sex. I've got news for you: as far as the majority of the straight and gay population is concerned, you are gay. If you aren't sending your family to PFLAG, you'd better go to their web site and try to figure out how to tell your family what you are. Oh, you're opposed to gay rights? Then you're the worst kind of gay: the kind that bashes gays publicly when you are one, just in the closet.

So there you have it: the Bible Belt is full of hypocritical closet-homosexual clergymen and politicians. Really, there is no other rational explanation. I'm not going to try to explain why these homosexuals oppose fair treatment for others of their own kind; you'll have to take that up with them.

This brings me to my last issue, which has to do with religion. What kind of religion discriminates against people for something out of their control? Oh, you lost your hand in an accident? You're tainted and corrupt. You have the wrong color of skin? You're not going to heaven!

Who would set up a religion that works like that? I've got news for you: if your religion teaches that homosexuals are bad/behave badly/need to be saved, your religion is being run by the Horned One With the Pitchfork.

If you're one of those fundamentalists who believes that your scripture is the literal word of the Deity and it condemns a homosexual sexual orientation, well, then, I guess you're obeying The Wrong Guy. Go ahead and say The Lord's Prayer backwards for all I care, but don't come in my house.

On the other hand, if you follow Thomas Aquinas's reasoning, that scripture is necessarily imperfect and incomplete because it is a human expression (thus inherently limited and imperfect) of a perfect and infinite G-d, well, then, isn't it clear The Bad Guy has corrupted your religion? What does that make you, to sit quietly by and to let Mr. Pitchfork's evil rhetoric be repeated as moral truth?

Finally, don't give me any of that hair splitting about loving the sinner but not his sins. First of all, most lay people aren't going to remember the distinction when their son or daughter comes out of the closet. Second, you're going to tell people that it's a sin for people to seek love and companionship in the way that G-d made them? That they are destined for a life of unhappiness because of the way that G-d made them? What a bunch of tripe.

In summary, I hope I've made it clear that I'm not gay. It's not even clear that I have close relatives who lean that way. It just outrages me that we would seek to persecute people for something over which they have no control. If you want to do that, why don't you just throw eggs at the next cripple you see in a wheelchair, why dontcha?

This Was a Tough Week...

2008-11-13T10:17:00.000-08:00

So, Monday a week ago my best friend got laid off. Before Friday, two more friends lost their jobs as well.

On Thursday I found out that an old house mate of mine dropped dead in his tracks, age 52, apparently of an aneurysm.

Then, on Tuesday, I found out that a fellow who is probably the closest I've ever had as a mentor, one that worked with me on the Tektronix Smalltalk project, and the fellow whom I followed when he left Tek to go to another company--this guy is dying of cancer and probably has days or weeks to live.

And you may wonder what I've been up to.

In my copious (NOT!) free time I've also been busy as chairman of the BTC. Our community cycling center is open, which is both exciting and scary.

Anyway, to leave on a positive note, here's an article from today's Oregonian/Oregon Live. Only in Portland!

Judge clears nude bicyclist in Portland

by Aimee Green, The Oregonian
Wednesday November 12, 2008, 8:46 PM

A Multnomah County judge has cleared a Northeast Portland nude bicyclist of criminal indecent exposure charges, saying cycling naked has become a "well-established tradition" in Portland and understood as a form of "symbolic protest."

Judge Jerome LaBarre said the city's annual World Naked Bike Ride -- in which as many as 1,200 people cycled through Northwest and downtown Portland on June 14 -- has helped cement riding in the buff as a form of protest against cars and possibly even the nation's dependence on fossil fuels.

LaBarre then cleared Michael "Bobby" Hammond, 21, of any wrongdoing after two days of hearings that concluded Wednesday.

Hammond's legal troubles began June 26, when he stripped off all his clothes and hopped on his vintage 1970s 10-speed -- in an effort, he says, to make clear that nothing was powering his mode of transportation but his own unadulterated body.

Portland police, however, saw Hammond's two-minute ride through the Alberta Arts District as a stunt, not free speech. They arrested Hammond, citing city code that states it's illegal to expose genitalia in a public place in view of members of the opposite sex.

A bystander recorded the episode, which unfolded at 10:30 p.m. in front of Hammond's home at Northeast 15th Avenue and Alberta Street. The video was posted on the Web.

As Hammond pulls to a stop, police begin to question him.

"Who, me?" responds an apparently startled Hammond, adding that he doesn't think he's doing anything wrong. A woman can be heard yelling in the background that Oregon law allows nudity -- as long as it isn't done to sexually arouse oneself or others.

"Dude, look," says one of three officers who approach Hammond. "Go put on pants, or we're going to take you to jail. There's a city code that says you can't be naked in public. There are kids out here. You can't be riding around with your penis hanging out, OK? ..."

"I just want to ride my bike," Hammond says. "I'm wearing a helmet."

"That's fine," responds another officer. "You want to go to jail tonight? Either you get your pants on right now (and) you get off your bike ... or you're going to jail."

Hammond gets off his bike. He stands still, almost frozen for several seconds as an officer can be heard counting down from five. When the officer gets to one, the trio bring Hammond to the ground during a 10-second struggle, because Hammond continues to hang onto his bike. The officers handcuff him, laying him naked on the street.

Hammond said later that a bystander offered to get him some clothes but that there wasn't time before police pulled him to the ground.

Lesser charges

Police originally charged Hammond with felony assault of a public safety officer, among other charges. The district attorney's office, however, decided not to pursue that charge and instead sought misdemeanor convictions for resisting arrest, fourth-degree assault and indecent exposure.

Hammond, who works at the Black Cat Cafe and as a caregiver for people with developmental disabilities, testified that he moved here more than a year ago from New Mexico. He said he thought nudity was legal in Portland because he'd participated in his first World Naked Bike Ride without incident.

"If anyone here hasn't been, you have to go," Hammond testified. "It's one of the reasons I live in Portland. As far as you can see -- as far in front of you and behind -- it's naked people."

Twelve days after the event, Hammond, housemates and friends sat on the lawn of his home, passing out origami, selling art and playing music during the art district's Last Thursday event. They bemoaned the car traffic congesting Alberta Street, and Hammond and a friend, Walter Geis, decided to strip down and ride their bikes up and down the boulevard.

Hammond testified that he was expressing a message in support of bikes and against cars, foreign oil, the Iraq war and air pollution.

Deputy District Attorney Ryan Lufkin argued that Hammond didn't carry any signs, pass out fliers or otherwise attempt to communicate his message to bystanders.

"He may have well thought he was doing this for a noble purpose, but there was no way to express that to a rational person," Lufkin said. "This was, by every definition of the word, streaking."

Lufkin told the judge that if he dismissed the charges against Hammond on free-speech grounds, he was in essence invalidating city code. Lufkin said anyone who'd been arrested for indecent exposure could argue they were exempt from the law because they were expressing speech.

A case-by-case issue

In 1985, the Oregon Court of Appeals ruled in City of Portland v. Gatewood that appearing nude in public can be a protected form of expression -- such as if it's done in political protest -- and should be considered on a case-by-case basis.

LaBarre said Hammond's case qualified as protected expression.

"It's been well-known since Lady Godiva that the shock value of nudity can be a very important protest," LaBarre said, referring to the legend of a noblewoman who rode naked on a horse through the streets of Coventry in England to protest her husband's oppressive taxation of the people.

Hammond was all smiles as the judge issued his decision. He hugged his attorney, public defender Tiffany Harris, and friends and neighbors who came to watch. He expressed his relief that he wouldn't lose his job as a caregiver. He said his employer, Westside Community Focus, had told him he would be fired for liability reasons if he were convicted.

He also made plans for the future: Would he ever ride naked again?

"Oh, yeah," he said.
Aimee Green; aimeegreen@news.oregonian.com

LCI #2106

2008-09-29T09:22:00.000-07:00

So, how does it feel to own a bicycle in a bicycle shortage? (That's 93 cars, by the way).

I just finished a very long weekend training to become a fledgling League Certified Instructor. I am now authorized to conduct classes on bicycling. My first classes I will need to have other instructors present.

Training consisted of 23 hours over Friday evening, Saturday, and Sunday. There were ten candidates and three LCI's in addition to the instructor.

Preparation included studying an entire textbook published by the League and a pretest on which we were required to achieve a passing score.

During the course of the weekend we were introduced to the principles of teaching and reaffirmed to the staff that we understood the material that we were supposed to be teaching. However, most of the time consisted of us modeling our role as teachers, giving both classroom and outside instruction to one another, covering all of the elements of "Road 1", the League's most common class.

We got to be evaluated by our peers as well as the senior LCI's. I'm still exhausted. You'll see me on my soapbox again soon

Doctors Visit and RSVP

2008-08-21T11:13:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I went to Portland to visit a doctor. As usual, I multi-moded: I rode to the train station, let the light rail haul me over the Tualatin Mountains into downtown, and then rode the last four blocks to the offices. After the visit I reversed the route, ran some errands in my neighborhood, then finished the day telecommuting from my house.

Since it was a pretty lousy day for August (temperature in the low 60's with occasional heavy showers), I wore more special clothing than I have lately. When the weather's perfect I've been getting away street clothes. However, yesterday called for a little less cotton and a bit more technical wear. That plus the obvious accoutrements (helmet, geek glasses, gloves, and the nearby bike on the train) made it clear that I was One of Them.

The interesting thing about this was that in the space of the hour and a half round trip and visit, I was accosted by three different people who wanted detailed technical advice on bike commuting. Not "Gee, I wish I could figure out a way to bike like you do." No, it was real questions, like "How do you pick your glasses?" "How do you ride in the rain?" "What do you do about getting your shoes wet?" "How do you keep from getting flats?"

On to other things. While I was sitting at the doctor's office, I heard a receptionist speaking to an older patient. She had the high-pitched slightly patronizing voice that I hear health care workers talking to patients who may be slightly...slow. "Mr XXXX, did you remember to take your heart medicine?" I looked up and saw a man, heavy set, mid 60's, stooped over and shuffling, wearing terry shorts and a T shirt, with a wet spot on the seat of his shorts.

My heart just fell. Here was a man who is beyond trying to retain dignity in public, who's just trying to stay alive. I was overwhelmed with a great sense of sadness at the thought of what it is for people to grow old and to slowly lose a grip on their quality of life as their body slowly fails them.

Well.

On to a lighter subject. I just finished a two day ride, the 2008 RSVP ("Ride from Seattle to Vancouver and Party). This ride is quickly becoming one of my favorite multi-day events. I think it's because the ride is structured in such a way that there really aren't any deadlines except for getting your bags on the truck in the morning. Since you ride through plenty of towns, you "live off the land" for your food. There are organized rest stops each day, but--again--it wouldn't be the end of the world if you even missed those since services are prevalent.

Anyway, since there's no pressure, I find myself not stressing about eating, sightseeing, taking pictures, and just overall plain enjoying the ride. I'm not the only one who's figured this out. This year they opened registration a month early but only for Cascade Bicycle Club members, and the ride sold out in two weeks. Yup, I belong to a Seattle bicycle club now.

Lynne (who is not my wife, my dear Clarkie likes for me to point out) and I rode it on Clifford the Tandem (as in Big and Red). As captain, I didn't get a lot of pictures, but Lynne got plenty in the back.

Thursday night we got to visit David and Claire again. They didn't do the ride this year. I think they were caught completely off guard by how quickly the ride filled up. I made it perfectly clear to them that I expect to see more of them next year! On the plus side I got to finally meet their younger daughter Emma, who's been shunted off to summer camp in years past. I was surprised to see that Crispin the Guinea Pig no longer lives there, but I was pleased to make friends with Luna.

The ride starts at the old Sand Point naval station north of UW and pretty much immediately sets north on the Burke-Gilman trail. (One of these days I want to ride the five miles between UW and Sand Point. STP starts at UW and heads south; if I ride that stretch I can say I've ridden the entire length between Portland and Vancouver BC.)

The Burke-Gilman is slowly getting more and more decrepit. Don't get me wrong; I'm glad they have a bike trail along there; it's just that they slapped asphalt down without any sort of road bed. Thus tree roots and other encroachments are slowly trashing the road surface. Combine that with slightly claustrophobic foliage and scores of riders who do not understand how to ride in groups, and I had one very stressed stoker. We took our time.

A note about the Cascade Bicycle Club riders. I understand that when you're the largest bicycle club in the country that you have to expect a greater incidence of accidents. However, I was dismayed to see hundreds of cyclists wearing ear buds while riding. This is against Washington law (and should be illegal everywhere, IMNSHO). Again, I am amazed at how many people think that just because they know how to brake, steer, pedal (and drive a motor vehicle), that they know how to safely operate a bicycle. It's kind of like young males who think that their Y chromosome gives them an instinctive understanding on how to ride a motorcycle. It just ain't so.

There were numerous route adjustments this year. The first big change I noticed was before Woodinville, where it seemed that we remained on the bike trail for much longer, presumably to bypass some construction on the normal route. I liked this change; the roads at this point are still far too urban for any real enjoyment.

After our obligatory Second Breakfast at the Buzz Inn in Snohomish, we started on the Centennial Trail with the infamous Bollards of Death. I've had enough apologizing, thank you very much, so we avoided any excitement here. Lynne and I felt as though we stayed on this bike path longer than last year as well. Again, this is a lot less stressful and a bit prettier than the semi-urban roads that the old route took us.

In Arlington we stopped for lunch at the Blue Bird Cafe. (Did I mention we eat like hobbits on this ride? First Breakfast, Second Breakfast, Elevenses...) I asked the store owner as we were paying if she got any warning about the swarm of locusts descending on her establishment. "Oh, I call and find out when it is now." Smart woman!

By the time we left Arlington, I definitely felt like we were running towards the rear of the pack. There was yet another route change on the climb ohere. Again, it seemed to take a lesser traveled route. It may have been slightly more climbing, but I think it was a bit more scenic. Around this time it was starting to get warm. We started seeing bicyclists lying in any available shade at the side of the road, kind of like roadkill. Lynne and I kept riding: "dropped on our heads too often as a child" she explained to one prone cyclist as we passed. It kept getting hotter and hotter. We just kept drinking water and riding.

A bit past Mount Vernon we entered the Skagit Valley. As usual, this part of the route included massive headwinds. Usually I just hunker down and bear it (though I really can't complain, being on a tandem.) This time though, I was truly grateful. Why? Can you say "onshore flow"? There, I knew you could. The air temperature was truly about twenty degrees cooler than it was on the climb out of Arlington!

I'm not sure if it was because of the cooler air temperatures or the fact that we weren't trying to kill ourselves, but the Chuckanut Drive climb seemed much easier than in years past. We made the obligatory stops at the overlooks and took the tourist pictures, made the Pink Lemonade Stop (Micaiah is a high school sophomore now, can you believe it?), and dropped down into Bellingham.

Lynne got us lost getting to the dorms and put us on this vile little street called Liberty Street that heads straight up Sehome Hill. I should have realized something was wrong when I saw the horizontal ridges on this street to provide traction.

We walked down to Boundary Bay to have dinner. I'm a little annoyed at them now and will probably pick a different place for dinner next year. When they said there was a 45 minute wait, we told the hostess we would wait in the beer garden. She took our name and my physical description, and we went down and had a pint. An hour and a half later Lynne went to check, and the new hostess said, "Oh, we skipped over your name because we don't go to the beer garden to fetch guests." Right. There are other places to eat, thank you very much.

As usual, the second day's ride is more about the destination than the scenery. Don't get me wrong; there are some great views, especially in the morning, including Wiser Lake and Mount Baker.

It's still fun to show up at an international border crossing on a bicycle.

Also, the ferry crossing was a bit faster than usual. The ferry man has figured out how to manage our crowd a bit better, I think.

We managed to get onto the "Pitt River Dike Trail Option" this year. It's a bit easy to miss, but Lynne was insistent that we give it a go. On the plus side, it avoids the truly atrocious traffic on 224th and Dewdney Trunk Road leading up to the Pitt River Bridge. It's also much more scenic.

On the down side, we're talking pea gravel with occasional divots in the road surface. Captain is vewwy vewwy busy. There isn't much coasting due to rolling resistance and the need to maintain stability mountain-bike style. The 700x28 tires on the tandem were quite sufficient to the task, by the way. Stoker is busy taking pictures.

By the time we reached Port Moody it was starting to get hot. Lynne was regaling me with fantasies of sprinklers and ice cream. I could really relate (well, not the ice cream; I'm lactose intolerant), but I was ready to stretch and rehydrate. I probably downed a quart of liquid while we were there. As we launched from the rest stop, I felt a sickening snap as I shifted gears. A quick analysis showed that my front shifter broke! We were left without our large chain ring for the last twenty miles. If you're going to lose a gear, that's probably the one to lose.

Climbing the Barnett Highway felt really hot, though I always get a kick out of the huge piles of sulfur down at the port. At the last part of the highway when I could see the top, I called for us to stand ("Arf!" stoker says.) Passing the prone cyclists in the shade we got cheers ("Look at them go!") Again, Lynne: "We were dropped on our heads as small children."

They've significantly improved the Frances/Union bicycle boulevard this year. Whereas before there have been interminable stop signs, they've been replaced this year with traffic roundabouts. Not only is this easier and safer for the cyclist, it made the Really Important Stop much more obvious (it's a very busy cross street that needs one's full attention.).

On the Adanac bike boulevard (Adanac is Canada backwards, get it?), we started to get a huge school of pilot fish as people realized someone was traveling with two hands free and calling out ride sheet cues. Lynne gets really popular at this point of the ride every year!

After settling in our hotel rooms, we had a quiet dinner at a local Japanese restaurant. The waitress looked slightly helpless as I asked for two pieces of octopus. Tako, I amended. She gave me a big grin. Hey, I only know six Japanese words, but sometimes I can get it right!

As usual, Sunday was spent making it back to Stumptown. It didn't take us long to get past immigration. The immigration officer didn't even look at our passports. Similarly, we didn't have a long wait back at Sand Point for our bicycles. I guess they didn't have to saw the bicycles apart and look for drugs this year like they did last year, where the bicycles didn't arrive for hours after us.

Like I said, my stoker got most of the pictures; browse them here.

You Need to Make Like a Flower and Pedal!

2008-08-06T15:01:00.000-07:00

You've Been Tagged...

2008-08-05T10:17:00.000-07:00

OK, I guess I've been tagged...my turn...

Q. If you could have any one — and only one — bike in the world, what would it be?
A: Stronger than the Incredible Hulk, lighter than a gnat's fart, carves corners like butter, steadier on the flats than a Harley chopper, cheap enough I can park it in front of WinCo, smoother than a baby's butt, stiffer than a ummm...what kind of bike would give me all of that?

Seriously, since I ride my bike over 300 days a year, I can't just settle on some sort of toy. I need one that I can use for commuting and grocery shopping: one that can withstand the mud, the rain, the grit, the just plain abuse a bike takes when you ride it year-round.

Q. Do you already have that coveted dream bike? If so, is it everything you hoped it would be? If not, are you working toward getting it? If you’re not working toward getting it, why not?
A. Oh, a dream bike. You know, my LeMond Carbon-Ti is a pretty sweet ride. See my previous answer, though. The tooth-rattling stiffness makes it an awesome speed machine, but an English century's worth of chip seal leaves me craving my 35 year old steel commuter.

Q. If you had to choose one — and only one — bike route to do every day for the rest of your life, what would it be, and why?
A: How about this year's Race Across Oregon? With 535 miles, there's enough that I might not get bored. Note also that at 535 miles in length, I could ride all day long :-)

Q. What kind of sick person would force another person to ride one and only one bike ride to to do for the rest of her/his life?
A. Someone who likes writing questionnaires.

Q. Do you ride both road and mountain bikes? If both, which do you prefer and why? If only one or the other, why are you so narrowminded?
A. 99% of my riding is road riding. Yes, I have a mountain bike. Some day after I win the lottery I'll be able to give it the attention it deserves. Good mountain bike riding requires significant skills that I haven't yet developed. I enjoy extremely non-technical mountain bike riding (Banks-Vernonia Linear Park, Forest Park, etc.) I also appreciate mountain bike riding in the winter when you just can't stay outside as long. However, I'm really more of a put-the-miles-behind-you zone-out-to-the-next-town kind of rider, not a ohmygodimgonnadie kind of adrenalin freak that seems to be the kind of person who's attracted to mountain biking.

Q. Have you ever ridden a recumbent? If so, why? If not, describe the circumstances under which you would ride a recumbent?
A. I've never had the opportunity, but I'm completely receptive to the notion. Many people report that as their spine becomes less flexible with age that they've been very happy on a recumbent. Personally, I'll stick with my "wedgie" for another ten or twenty years.

Q. Have you ever raced a triathlon? If so, have you also ever tried strangling yourself with dental floss?
A. No. Every time I consider it, I remember I have an urgent date to floss my cat's teeth. Seriously, I have a real problem with swimming. My neurotic nurturing female-type parent forced me into serious swimming lessons at the Y when I was a kid; she was deathly afraid I was going to drown. Finally, my freshman year in college that made me jump three stories from the rafters into the swimming pool, fully clothed. Did I mention I'm afraid of heights? The result is that it's totally killed any enjoyment I have of being in the water. I fall in the water, I swim to the side and get out; no problem, no enjoyment. Perhaps I'll try a duathlon one day.

Q. Suppose you were forced to either give up ice cream or bicycles for the rest of your life. Which would you give up, and why?
A. Well, duh: ice cream, of course. I'm lactose intolerant!

Q. What is a question you think this questionnaire should have asked, but has not? Also, answer it. What size of shoes do you wear?
A. "How many bikes do you own, and how many bikes do you really need?"
A2: Five: commuter, racing, fixie, mountain, tandem. And who says that need enters into it at all?

Q. You’re riding your bike in the wilderness (if you’re a roadie, you’re on a road, but otherwise the surroundings are quite wilderness-like) and you see a bear. The bear sees you. What do you do?
A. Leave. Quickly.

Real Cowboys Wear Cleats

2008-07-29T13:36:00.000-07:00

[Photo from Jonathan Maus]

'nuff said!

Social Suicide and Race Across Oregon

2008-07-28T15:00:00.001-07:00

It was a week ago, but I've finally got the Race Across Oregon pictures posted.

I was the crew chief for a four-man over-50 team called "Old Goats for Cycle One." I didn't get the memo, or I would have grown a goatee like everyone else (except Bev and Laura, of course), such as Mike Manning's here.

Race Across Oregon is a grueling endurance race. It starts in Portland, winds up to Government Camp via Sandy, and then loops through central Oregon all the way out to Prineville before ending up back at Timberline Lodge (yes, as in Kubrick's The Shining) for the finish line. It constitutes 535 miles and about forty thousand feet of climbing. And it's not a stage race. You snooze, you lose!

As a consequence, every participating team is required to have support vehicles. At night, a vehicle must trail the rider with the rider in their headlights and two pairs of flashing amber lights clearly visible from the rear. During the second day this is strongly advised though not strictly required.

Our team had a small RV and two outfitted pickup trucks for the support vehicles. JR and I ran the second pickup truck, which substituted for the main follow vehicle when necessary and held the bike for the next rider.

The course ran through some breathtaking scenery, and I use the word breathtaking for two reasons. First, it was flat out gorgeous. I kept thinking to myself, "I want to ride this--but not all 535 miles at once." Second, this is some of the most remote country I've been in, out side of say, a Cycle Oregon ride. We had 15 spare gallons of gasoline loaded in the pickup trucks, and we used ten of them to keep on the road.

The part of the race I remember most vividly was waiting at the top of Ochoco Summit around two in the morning waiting for our rider to scale the last rise before Mitchell. We had our motors off and were frankly just grabbing half an hour of sleep waiting for Kevin to show up. The Milky Way was resplendent above, and the site was completely silent except for the wind. Us city slickers don't get that kind of solitude very often.

JR and I took turns driving. JR was an excellent shotgun, especially at that dark hour of the morning where your diurnal clock is saying sleep sleep SLEEP!. JR is an interesting character, a therapist retired from the Veterans Administration and the Washington County area who moved to Prineville about two years ago.

JR, it turns out, runs about ten marathons a year and is preparing for an Ironman later this year. Did I mention he's 64 years old? I wanna be like him when I grow up!

I told JR, somewhat tentatively, that I felt like many older people who have grown physically inactive have just given up on their bodies. "Oh, that's probably about 85 to 100% of the people I saw at the VA". He continued: "The worst were the 'social suicides'."

"What are those?" after I pass the follow vehicle and start up the hill.

"Those are the people who are killing themselves with destructive behavior. Like the guy on an oxygen tank who turns off his oxygen, steps outside for a cigarette, and then spends 20 minutes coughing before he can turn on his oxygen again."

I was surprised to hear him quote such a large percentage. I certainly don't want to say it's 100%; I mean, there are certainly people out there like Christopher Reeve who have less control over their physical health than others.

However, coming from a health care professional, that's pretty damning. Do you want to run an Ironman in your mid-sixties, or do you want to curl up with your pill bottles and watch The Price is Right?

Many hours went by...and then I resumed the thread. "You know, JR, there's a connection between the automobile and social suicide that I don't think people have grasped."

"Oh?"

"Well, I just read not too long ago that the average American walks 350 yards per day. I beginning to wonder if there is a connection between that dreadful number and metabolic syndrome. Further, metabolic syndrome generates a vicious spiral where the individual is less likely to exercise and make other positive life choices because of their weight."

Portland Parks and Recreation hates bicyclists. They chose to block a bike rack instead of putting the blue room in an automobile parking space. Or, as one person put it, "Bikes mean less than crap to PP&R".

It just amazes me how people aren't willing to connect the dots when it comes to little choices they make (like in this picture) and the overall issues involving public health and health care.

Speaking of which, my wife made it out of day surgery on Friday, but not unscathed. They shooed her out of the clinic, and by the time we got home she was in severe pain. The doctor's advice? Go to the emergency room. Fooey. That is the least efficient method to acquire medical care. But we did so. We were amazed at the long wait, at eleven in the morning on a Friday. The staff allows that the demand has doubled in the last six months. What in the world is going on? Anyway, my wife is fine. Once she was "caught up" on her pain management, the prescribed medication was completely sufficient for the rest of the weekend.

Back to RAO: our intrepid crew made it fifth across the finish line, and we set a course record for our division. It was actually a bit disappointing, because the other group in our classification gave us a great run for our money for about the first 130 miles. I was kind of looking forward to a tense tight race, but after about 9 PM on the first day we didn't see them again.

The Most Advanced Engine in the World

2008-07-26T09:08:00.001-07:00

My wife had a "day surgery" yesterday and she fell off of the back of the conveyor belt before her pain was under control. I ended up with a very stressed wife and a very long and expensive trip to the emergency room for "pain management." If they'd kept her at day surgery for another half an hour I think we could have avoided all of that annoyance.

On to lighter subects: yes, it's an advertisement. It's still great.

T plus Eight Weeks

2008-07-13T11:14:00.001-07:00

I see that a number of people have found my blog because they were googling on terms like "low testosterone." If you aren't interested in my health issues, you might want to skip this post. If you're reading my blog for the first time, I write a lot about bicycling and living west of Portland, Oregon. However, I found in the spring that I was suffering a hormonal deficiency, and both the ailment and its treatment have been life changing. When I mentioned this to my primary care physician, she said she believes it's one of the most under-diagnosed ailments in older men.

Since I started getting the shots about two months ago, my quality of life has altered drastically, mostly because of the treatment. Testosterone therapy is a risky and scary thing. The potential side effects can be life threatening, which actually caused me to delay seeking treatment for about half a year. I want to discuss the flip side today, which is that if you need it, you should seriously consider trying it.

You know, when you think about it, if women's ovaries can wear out, why not men's testicles? However, I think the similarity stops there. Women have these whip-saw once-a-month hormonal swings, whereas men have fairly constant androgen levels that slowly decrease with age. My point is that while menopause has positive as well as negative health benefits, male andropause seems, according to my research, to have mostly negative results.

The remainder of this entry is a presentation of the perceived effects to date. They're mostly positive, and-of course--YMMV (your mileage may vary). The list is so huge that I've had to make a list before seeing my specialist next month. That in itself should give you a pretty good sense of how significant this treatment is. I want this message to get out because testosterone deficiency is such a gradual thing that it's easy to dismiss the effects until you wake up one day with an acute symptom.

The web sites that say "do you have low testosterone? take the test" didn't really help me very much. All of the questions were "gimme's", things like you're not happy with your weight or your athletic performance, or you're more tired, or wondering about your sexual performance. Excuse me? How am I supposed to distinguish between the normal effects of aging and all the things you're talking about?

Instead, I'd like to share my personal experience with this treatment, to give you an idea of how dramatic the changes can be. Again, this treatment isn't for everyone. I'll be on blood tests for the rest of my life, and the shots are a pain in the butt, both figuratively and literally. It might even kill me. However, the quality of life difference has been immense, and I hope if your doctor has diagnosed you with low testosterone (below 300 ng/dL) and you think you're having some quality of life issues, that you'll seriously consider at least trying the treatment.

One section deals with urogenital effects. If you're uncomfortable hearing those things, you might want to skip to another one of my posts.

Mental Effects

I'm listing these first because the mental symptoms had the earliest onset.

greater visual erotic stimulation, [+1 day] Yeah, I like looking at women again. I mean, for a while there, it was the weirdest thing: "yes, she's pretty, but I just don't care." Is this a positive or a negative? Well, let me put it in a way that women understand: do you like looking at cute animals? You like looking at children? Yeah, it's kinda like that; it's one of those small daily pleasures in life.
more assertive [+4 days] No, I don't mean aggressive; I mean standing up and getting my point across.
more sexual thoughts [+2 weeks] One point last winter I realized that I could go for a day or more without thinking about sex. Women might wonder what the big deal is, but I'm sure men out there know that that just ain't right.
clearer thinking [+2 weeks] Me hunter. You mammoth. Me chase mammoth. Seriously, though, my ability to follow complex reasoning seems to have improved.
less grumpy [+3 weeks] I don't normally use the word "grumpy" to characterize my bad moods. Anxiety is term I would more commonly use. But over the winter my problems went beyond any sort of anxiety or seasonal afflictive disorder syndrome.
more competitive [+4 weeks] Just the sort of thing women roll their eyes about. Guy pulled up to me on another bike at a stop light and blew by me as it just turned green. I wasn't about to seem slower than him. Oh, yes, I last saw him half a block behind me.

Athletic Performance:

Faster cycling [+1 day] There is an immediate effect on my cycling performance, both overall and the day after a shot. (Sorry, Floyd Landis.)
Reduced recovery time [+4 weeks] After the Birkenfeld Brevet I was sore the second day after the ride. I'd never had that before, and I don't now.
Stronger (25% more power in 6 weeks just bike commuting). Let me explain this. When I commute around town, I don't make it an athletic event. I ride at a comfortable pace. I start coasting when I see I'll have to stop because of a light or a stop sign. All of these things mean that my average speed, as measured by miles traveled divided by total on-saddle time, is not going to be very impressive. Every two weeks or so I copy those two numbers off of the cycle computer on my thirty pound monster and enter them into my training log. Imagine my surprise when I saw this dramatic increase in average speed.
Faster running [+6 weeks] I suck at running. But it's good for you. All winter long I just could not get my mileage up, and my perceived exertion was pretty high. I still suck, but I suck less bad at it now.

Uro-genital:
Not for the squeamish, but since one of the major indicators of low testosterone is low sex drive, it's not fair for me to omit this.

stronger orgasms [+4 weeks] I just wasn't enjoying sex as much. This changed surprisingly quckly.
more frequent orgasms [+4 weeks] Kinda goes with having a greater sex drive.
spontaneous erections (with sexual thoughts) [+6 weeks] Man, I haven't had this symptom since, well, my twenties.
frequent morning erections [+6 weeks] It's actually an annoyance since usually you need to urinate.
more semen [+6 weeks] This needs some discussion. I had discounted the decrease in semen as a side effect of another drug I'm on. As soon as I noticed this change from the the therapy, another light bulb went off: PSA == Prostate Specific Antigen, a rapid increase of which may indicate prostate cancer, which in turn means runaway metabolic activity (cancer cells). And, my specialist is avidly looking to find a new baseline measure for my PSA level because of the treatment. Aha! It all makes sense!
possibly more hesitation when urinating, esp. at night -- I can't even say for sure this is happening, but all the medical geeks say that increased urinary problems are possible.

Other:

no more hot flashes [immediate] Waking up at four in the morning covered in a cold sweat for no apparent reason was not enjoyable.
higher heart rate (both resting and max [+1 day] This is not reported in the literature, but my resting heart rate had dropped about 15 beats per minute over the last year or two before the treatment started. My maximum heart rate has also risen close to its previous levels.
More energy (perceived tiredness, amount of sleep) [+2 weeks] I'm still lazy and I still procrastinate, but I'm not so flippin' tired all the time.
oily face [+3 weeks] It seems like whenever I wash my hands in the bathroom, I also wash my face now.
scalp fungus [+4 weeks] Way back when dinosaurs roamed the earth, I went to my doctor and complained about acne on my scalp. He said it wasn't acne, it was fungus brought on by my body chemistry. He prescribed a shampoo back then, which I use on an as-needed basis, typically in the spring and fall. However, I realized when this symptom recurred that I hadn't had it in about five years. I'm betting this is closely related to the oily skin.
sleeping much better [+4 weeks] I wasn't expecting this one. I fall asleep faster and I awaken less frequently. My middle-aged male visit to the bathroom in the middle of the night is much less annoying now. It goes without saying that I am also much more rested upon arising in the morning.
improved sense of smell [+6 weeks] Hunh? Hey, I'm just reporting it. I can smell again. Probably not good for any weight loss attempts, since I enjoy eating again.
increased beard growth [+8 weeks] I know, this is frequently reported in the literature, but have I very little beard to begin with (my Cherokee ancestry, I'd like to think), so I wasn't really expecting anything dramatic here. However, I simply can't skip a day of shaving any more.

What have I not seen? Well, no "roid rage", but I think my emotional demeanor was pretty decent to begin with, and the medical geeks believe this is actually an exacerbation of existing emotional problems. Also, I haven't lost any significant weight yet (drat!), but I would expect that to be very gradual. Finally, I have so little hair on my head that any hair loss would be imperceptible. I'm not a "chrome dome", but it's already very thin, so I doubt this will ever be an issue for me.

Portland in the News

2008-07-08T10:03:00.001-07:00

The tide is shifting. Are you part of the problem or part of the solution?

More on the Columbia River Crossing

2008-07-07T12:16:00.000-07:00

I just read this morning that the Columbia River Crossing will only be effective for twenty years.

Umm. This is a four billion dollar bridge. For those of you who don't live in the D.C. beltway, that's a lot of money.

It's time to do a bit of arithmetic. Let's assume that the bridge carries the expected amount of 2030 traffic for its entire twenty years, with no reduction in frequency due to tolls.

That ends up being

$4.0e9 / (20 years) / (365 days/year) / (225000 trips / day) = 2.50 $/crossing

That's two and a half clams for every single crossing. Five dollars for a round trip.

However, the CRC people themselves acknowledge that if that charge a toll, fewer people will use the bridge. The new math:

$4.0e9 / (20 years) / (365 days/year) / (178000 trips / day) = $3.08

Surely they can't be smoking the whacky weed on both sides of the river. Why are people even considering this? The goal should be to efficiently move people, goods, and services across the river.

Why do people choose to haul 3500 pounds of polluting metal over the existing Interstate bridge twice a day? It's because they need it in order to conduct their business once they make it onto this side of the river.

Let's put this in terms we can all understand. Tri-Met's operating budget for the current fiscal year is about $300M. If we were to invest the CRC money directly into Tri-Met, it would increase our capitalization in mass transit by over fifty percent. over that same 20 year period.

I visualize cross-town links from Milwaukie to Tualatin, connecting Vancouver into the grid, and out lier support for areas such as Oregon City and Sherwood.

Even if we earmarked some of that money for improvements to the existing bridges (light rail crossing and needed repairs), the resulting infrastructure would be on an order to rival that of Manhattan, Tokyo, or any other major city in the world.

The CRC proposal is criminal (treasonous) thinking on the part of the terrorist-loving automobile pushers. I'll stop now.

This is how my day has been going...

2008-07-03T16:49:00.000-07:00

Yeah, it's kinda like this...

Y.A.T.G.

2008-07-01T10:26:00.000-07:00

(Yet Another Traffic Gripe)

Sorry for the annoyance, but hey, if you are a motorist but haven't yet started using your body (walk, run, bicycle, skateboard) to get around, the message needs to be made.

This morning a motorist passed me on a narrow stretch with no shoulder and an oncoming car. No, "Brenna" (as her vanity plate read) didn't get over into the other lane; I could have reached out and touched her car as she passed.

As I explained to a friend later, "I had a moment of inattention." Really, that's how I'm beginning to see it. There seems to be a natural human inclination tendency to decide that if it's possible to pass a cyclist without crossing the yellow line, then it is safest to do so.

Yeah, right. For everyone except the cyclist.

The frustrating irony of it is that when a motorist chooses to cross over the center line, they will almost always give me plenty of room. There's a psychological threshold that gets crossed when a motorist goes over the center line. I don't even think it's an issue of a motorist being in a hurry. When I force a motorist to wait, I never get a sense that they're frustrated or impatient. (I know, never is a strong word. It could happen one day, but it hasn't yet.)

So, it's my responsibility to control the situation. Whenever it is unsafe to pass, I will move far enough to the left. (Thanks, Hal Ballard. Your advice to "control the lane" is becoming more and more central to my defensive cycling practice now.)

So why am I writing about this? I've discussed this before, and I'm probably preaching to the choir anyway. The point is, the Uniform Vehicle Code and the Oregon Revised Statutes both state that cyclists are to ride "as far to the right as practicable."

My concern is that I am taking a very liberal interpretation of this phrase. I found myself wishing (as "Brenna" turned onto Huntington, clearly another non-local using my side street as a through street short cut) that the legislature would grant me some specific allowances for these kinds of situations: passing over a solid yellow line, passing on a bridge, passing when oncoming traffic precludes achieving a safe distance).

According to John Forester, only three percent of all bicycle-motor vehicle accidents involve the cyclist being overtaken by the motor vehicle from the rear. I find myself arguing vehemently with people who think it's safer on the sidewalk that they are deluding themselves. (They're actually less safe, but that's another topic.)

And yet...

There is no other time that any vehicle travels as close to any other vehicle as when a motorist commits one of these unsafe passes of a cyclist. Think of it: even when you're traveling in adjacent lanes on a freeway you don't pass another automobile with such little clearance. Even when a cyclist is in an adjoining bike lane, you don't pass so closely.

Although I disagree with the cyclists who ride on the sidewalk, I sympathize with their concern. These unsafe passes, in my not-so-humble-opinion, are the most dangerous situations that I face with any type of frequency.

I understand the scorn of the Dutch blogger who said that American cyclists need helmets because they fall so much (evidently Dutch cyclists are thirty times less likely to get in an accident than American cyclists, and if you google on this you'll see there's quite a bit of controversy about whether helmets are worthwhile). However, I don't think it's the American cyclist that's the problem; it's the American motorist.

Why Building Roads Doesn't Ease Congestion

2008-06-24T13:18:00.000-07:00

A quote from Gil Penelosa's keynote speech at the 2008 Carfree conference:

70% of the public space in Los Angeles is dedicated to car mobility… 20% of public space in Paris is dedicated to car mobility. In which city would you rather live?”

I can't say it any better. Here's an article I lifted from the opposition to the Vancouver BC Gateway Project. This is pertinent because of own local stupidity, the Columbia River Crossing project. Enjoy.

Why building new roads doesn't ease congestion

An excerpt from Suburban Nation: The Rise of Sprawl and the Decline of the American Dream
by Andres Duany, Elizabeth Plater-Zyberk, and Jeff Speck
North Point Press, 2000, pp. 88-94.

There is a much deeper problem than the way highways are placed and managed. It is the question of why we are still building highways at all.

The simple truth is that building more highways and widening existing roads, almost always motivated by concern over traffic, does nothing to reduce traffic. In the long run, in fact, it increases traffic. This revelation is so counterintuitive that it bears repeating: adding lanes makes traffic worse. This paradox was suspected as early as 1942 by Robert Moses, who noticed that the highways he had built around New York City in 1939 were somehow generating greater traffic problems than had existed previously. Since then, the phenomenon has been well documented, most notably in 1989, when the Southern California Association of Governments concluded that traffic-assistance measures, be they adding lanes, or even double-decking the roadways, would have no more than a cosmetic effect on Los Angeles' traffic problems. The best it could offer was to tell people to work closer to home, which is precisely what highway building mitigates against.

Across the Atlantic, the British government reached a similar conclusion. Its studies showed that increased traffic capacity causes people to drive more--a lot more--such that half of any driving-time savings generated by new roadways are lost in the short run. In the long run, potentially all savings are expected to be lost. In the words of the Transport Minister, "The fact of the matter is that we cannot tackle our traffic problems by building more roads."² While the British have responded to this discovery by drastically cutting their road-building budgets, no such thing can be said about Americans.

There is no shortage of hard data. A recent University of California at Berkeley study covering thirty California counties between 1973 and 1990 found that, for every 10 percent increase in roadway capacity, traffic increased 9 percent within four years' time.³ For anecdotal evidence, one need only look at commuting patterns in those cities with expensive new highway systems. USA Today published the following report on Atlanta: "For years, Atlanta tried to ward off traffic problems by building more miles of highways per capita than any other urban area except Kansas City…As a result of the area's sprawl, Atlantans now drive an average of 35 miles a day, more than residents of any other city."· This phenomenon, which is now well known to those members of the transportation industry who wish to acknowledge it, has come to be called induced traffic.

The mechanism at work behind induced traffic is elegantly explained by an aphorism gaining popularity among traffic engineers: "Trying to cure traffic congestion by adding more capacity is like trying to cure obesity by loosening your belt." Increased traffic capacity makes longer commutes less burdensome, and as a result, people are willing to live farther and farther from their workplace. As increasing numbers of people make similar decisions, the long-distance commute grows as crowded as the inner city, commuters clamor for additional lanes, and the cycle repeats itself. This problem is compounded by the hierarchical organization of the new roadways, which concentrate through traffic on as few streets as possible.

The phenomenon of induced traffic works in reverse as well. When New York's West Side Highway collapsed in 1973, an NYDOT study showed that 93 percent of the car trips lost did not reappear elsewhere; people simply stopped driving. A similar result accompanied the destruction of San Francisco's Embarcadero Freeway in the 1989 earthquake. Citizens voted to remove the freeway entirely despite the apocalyptic warnings of traffic engineers. Surprisingly, a recent British study found that downtown road removals tend to boost local economies, while new roads lead to higher urban unemployment. So much for road-building as a way to spur the economy.·

If traffic is to be discussed responsibly, it must first be made clear that the level of traffic which drivers experience daily, and which they bemoan so vehemently, is only as high as they are willing to countenance. If it were not, they would adjust their behavior and move, carpool, take transit, or just stay at home, as some choose to do. How crowded a roadway is at any given moment represents a condition of equilibrium between people's desire to drive and their reluctance to fight traffic. Because people are willing to suffer inordinately in traffic before seeking alternatives--other than clamoring for more highways--the state of equilibrium of all busy roads is to have stop-and-go traffic. The question is not how many lanes must be built to ease congestion but how many lanes of congestion would you want? Do you favor four lanes of bumper-to-bumper traffic at rush hour, or sixteen?

This condition is best explained by what specialists call latent demand. Since the real constraint on driving is traffic, not cost, people are always ready to make more trips when the traffic goes away. The number of latent trips is huge--perhaps 30 percent of existing traffic. Because of latent demand, adding lanes is futile, since drivers are already poised to use them up.⁴

While the befuddling fact of induced traffic is well understood by sophisticated traffic engineers, it might as well be a secret, so poorly has it been disseminated. The computer models that transportation consultants use do not even consider it, and most local public works directors have never heard of it at all. As a result, from Maine to Hawaii, city, county, and even state engineering departments continue to build more roadways in anticipation of increased traffic, and, in doing, create that traffic. The most irksome aspect of this situation is that these road-builders are never proved wrong; in fact, they are always proved 'right': "You see," they say, "I told you that traffic was coming."

The ramifications are quite unsettling. Almost all of the billions of dollars spent on road-building over the past decades have accomplished only one thing, which is to increase the amount of time that we must spend in our cars each day. Americans now drive twice as many miles per year as they did just twenty years ago. Since 1969, the number of miles cars travel has grown at four times the population rate.· And we're just getting started: federal highway officials predict that over the next twenty years congestion will quadruple. Still, every congressman, it seems, wants a new highway to his credit.·

Thankfully, alternatives to road-building are being offered, but they are equally misguided. If, as is now clear beyond any reasonable doubt, people maintain an equilibrium of just-bearable traffic, then the traffic engineers are wasting their time--and our money--on a whole new set of stopgap measures that produce temporary results as best. These measures, which include HOV (high-occupancy vehicle) lanes, congestion pricing, timed traffic lights, and "smart streets," serve only to increase highway capacity, which causes more people to drive until the equilibrium condition of crowding returns. While certainly less wasteful than new construction, these measures also do nothing to address the real cause of traffic congestion, which is that people choose to put up with it.

We must admit that, in an ideal world, we would be able to build our way out of traffic congestion. The new construction of 50 percent of more highways nationwide would most likely overcome all of the latent demand. However, to provide more than temporary relief, this huge investment would have to be undertaken hand in hand with a moratorium on suburban growth. Otherwise, the new subdivisions, shopping malls, and office parks made possible by the new roadways would eventually choke them as well. In the real world, such moratoriums are rarely possible, which is why road-building is typically a folly.

Those who are skeptical of the need for a fundamental reconsideration of transportation planning should take note of something we experienced a few years ago. In a large working session on the design of Playa Vista, an urban infill project in Los Angeles, the traffic engineer was presenting a report of current and projected congestion around the development. From our seat by the window, we had an unobstructed rush-hour view of a street he had diagnosed as highly congested and in need of widening. Why, then, was traffic flowing smoothly, with hardly any stacking at the traffic light? When we asked, the traffic engineer offered an answer that should be recorded permanently in the annals of the profession: "The computer model that we use does not necessarily bear any relationship to reality."

But the real question is why so many drivers choose to sit for hours in bumper-to-bumper traffic without seeking alternatives. Is it a manifestation of some deep-seated self-loathing, or are people just stupid? The answer is that people are actually quite smart, and their decision to submit themselves to the misery of suburban commuting is a sophisticated response to a set of circumstances that are as troubling as their result. Automobile use is the intelligent choice for most Americans because it is what economists refer to as a "free good": the consumer pays only a fraction of its true cost. The authors Stanley Hart and Alvin Spivak have explained that:

We learn in first-year economics what happens when products or services become "free" goods. The market functions chaotically; demand goes through the roof. In most American cities, parking spaces, roads and freeways are free goods. Local government services to the motorist and to the trucking industry--traffic engineering, traffic control, traffic lights, police and fire protection, street repair and maintenance--are all free goods.·

1	This article is an excerpt from Andres Duany, Elizabeth Plater-Zyberk, and Jeff Speck. Suburban Nation: The Rise of Sprawl and the Decline of the American Dream, North Point Press, 2000, 88-94.
2	Donald D.T. Chen. "If You Build It, They Will Come…Why We Can't Build Ourselves Our of Congestion." Surface Transportation Policy Project Progress VII.2 (March 1998): I, 4.
3	Ibid., 6.
�	Carol Jouzatis. "39 Million People Work, Live Outside City Centers." USA Today, November 4, 1997: 1A-2A. As a result of its massive highway construction, the Atlanta area is "one of the nation's worst violators of Federal standards for ground-level ozone, with most of the problem caused by motor-vehicle emissions" (Kevin Sack. "Governor Proposes Remedy for Atlanta Sprawl." The New York Times, January 26, 1999: A14).
�	Jill Kruse. "Remove It and They Will Disappear: Why Building New Roads Isn't Always the Answer." Surface Transportation Policy Project Progress VII:2 (March 1998): 5, 7. This study, in analyzing sixty road closures worldwide, found that 20 percent to 60 percent of driving trips disappeared rather than materializing elsewhere.
4	Stanley Hart and Alvin Spivak. The Elephant in the Bedroom: Automobile Dependence and Denial; Impacts on the Economy and Environment. Pasadena, Calif.: New Paradigm Books, 1993, 122.
�	Jane Holtz Kay. Asphalt Nation: How the Automobile Took Over America, and How We Can Take It Back. New York: Crown, 1997, 15; and Peter Calthorpe. The Next American Metropolis: Ecology, Community, and the American Dream. New York: Princeton Architectural Press, 1993, 27. Since 1983, the number of miles cars travel has grown at eight time s the population rate (Urban Land Institute traffic study). The greatest increases in automobile use correspond to the greatest concentrations of sprawl. Annual gasoline consumption per person in Phoenix and Houston is over 50 percent higher than in Chicago or Washington, D.C., and over 500 percent higher than in London or Tokyo (Peter Newman and Jeff Kenworthy. Winning Back the Cities. Sydney: Photo Press, 1996, 9). Currently, almost 70 percent of urban freeways are clogged during rush hour (Jason Vest, Warren Cohen, and Mike Tharp. "Road Rage." U.S. News & World Report, June 2, 1997: 24-30). In Los Angeles, congestion has already reduced average freeway speeds to less than 31 mph; by the year 2010, they are projected to fall to 11 mph (James MacKenzie, Roger Dower, and Donald Chen. The Going Rate: What It Really Costs to Drive. Report by the World Resources Institute, 1992, 17).
�	Almost any situation seems acceptable to justify more highway spending, even the recent road rage epidemic. Representative Bud Schuster, the chairman of the U.S. Congressional Committee on Transportation and Infrastructure, made this recommendation: "The construction of additional lanes, the widening of roads and the straightening of curves would decrease congestion and reduce the impatience and unsafe habits of some motorists" (Thomas Palmer. "Pacifying Road Warriors." The Boston Globe, July 25, 1997: A1, B5).
�	Stanley Hard and Alvin Spivak, The Elephant in the Bedroom: Automobile Dependence and Denial, 2. Much of the information here on the science and economics of traffic congestion comes from this book, which should be required reading for every professional planner, traffic engineer, and amateur highway activist.
	The logic behind the desire to make use of free goods is suggested by an argument overheard at a recent planning conference: "Of course there's never enough parking! If you gave everyone free pizza, would there be enough pizza?"

Big Business and Automotive Ads

2008-06-17T08:55:00.000-07:00

I watched an hour of prime time television last night. I'm not entirely TV-free; I probably watch about two hours a week. Last night the stars all fell into alignment and I watched an episode of House. (My daughter the actress says that Laurie's gift is timing; he delivers all of these deadpan lines with absolute perfection.) For the record, I enjoy the show; I just don't often stay up that late on Mondays.

Anyway, just for the fun of it, I counted the number of automobile (and related) commercials. In the space of one hour I saw six commercials. (I say related because one was a Les Schwab advertisement. Les Schwab is a great place, but it really has no goods or services to offer you unless you own or maintain an automobile.)

An aside: the basics of human memory...

In graduate school at Georgia Tech we extensively studied human intelligence as part of my artificial intelligence (AI) curriculum. There was (and still is) a huge gap between human intelligence and what we've been able to achieve with computers, but the hope still remains, even today, that as we understand human intelligence better we might be able to achieve some rough semblance thereof with computers.

Anyway, one of the things we studied was the model of memory. Humans have three types of memory: short term, intermediate term, and long term. Short term memory is principally auditory, lasts up to about 30 seconds, and can hold about five to seven items. Imagine reading a telephone number and then punching it into your phone. Intermediate term lasts from 30 minutes to two hours, and long term is how your grandparents regale you with stories of walking barefoot in the snow uphill both ways to school when they were young.

We know (thanks again to the experimental psychologists) that memories are created and stored strictly in this pipeline, moving first in short term, some of the short term memories making it to intermediate term, and some of those making it to long term. I helped my son learn the state capitols one day in middle school by using my AI background, burning the knowledge into his intermediate term memory and then burning it repeatedly at one hour intervals through the evening. He still remembers them :-)

There are even aphasias where one of the three types of memory are disrupted. I have a personal experience with short term memory disruption. About three years ago I suffered a completely mysterious bicycle crash. I say mysterious because I was riding alone, though there were a couple of witnesses on the street when it happened. I say mysterious because when I replay my recollection of the event there is a profound...discontinuity...in the recollection; one moment I'm riding along the street, and the next I'm standing by the bicycle inspecting it for damage with people running up to me asking if I was all right. (Well, I wasn't, not really, but that's another story.) Short term memory disruption is not uncommon with mild concussions, and my AI background allows me to understand the mechanism, but it was still downright creepy to experience it.

Anyway, back to House.

By including advertisements for automobiles at such frequent intervals, Big Business is essentially pounding their messages into long-term memory. The messages are things like,

Cars are fun.
Cars are glamorous.
You need a car.
Everyone should have a car.

Jonathan Maus once wrote, "Cars are the new smoking." This blitz of advertising reminds me of growing up in the 1960's when television was rife with tobacco ads (oh, and liquor too). Society finally moved to limit this advertising, especially to youth and other vulnerable market segments. Nowadays we see the following kinds of labeling on cigarettes:

Caution: Cigarette Smoking May be Hazardous to Your Health (1966)
Warning: The Surgeon General Has Determined that Cigarette Smoking is Dangerous to Your Health (1970)
SURGEON GENERAL'S WARNING: Smoking Causes Lung Cancer, Heart Disease, Emphysema, And May Complicate Pregnancy.
SURGEON GENERAL'S WARNING: Quitting Smoking Now Greatly Reduces Serious Risks to Your Health.
SURGEON GENERAL'S WARNING: Smoking By Pregnant Women May Result in Fetal Injury, Premature Birth, And Low Birth Weight.
SURGEON GENERAL'S WARNING: Cigarette Smoke Contains Carbon Monoxide.

I say we should start adding warnings to automobile advertising. No, I'm entirely serious. If we can decide as a society that we need to add warnings because people are hurting themselves, shouldn't we be even more inclined to include warnings for behavior that hurts others? Here are a few suggestions for starters:

DEPT HOMELAND SECURITY WARNING: Foreign Oil Funds Anti-American Terrorism.
SURGEON GENERAL'S WARNING: Automobile Use Causes Cancer in Children.
SURGEON GENERAL'S WARNING: Automobile Use May Cause Obesity, Diabetes, and Heart Disease.
ENVIRONMENTAL PROTECTION AGENCY WARNING: Automobile Use Destroys Farmland, Fisheries, and Wildlife Habitat.
US DEPT COMMERCE WARNING: Private Automobiles Have Made the US a Debtor Nation.
UNITED NATIONS WARNING: Private Automobiles Have Caused Global Warming.

Any others you can think of?

Store Cat

2008-06-16T14:22:00.000-07:00

The middle of last week, my wife calls me. Evidently there was a lost kitten wandering around outside the shopping center where our bead shop is. Well, OK, so we'll take care of it for a while. We've searched for the owner, but there are no "lost cat" notices and no implanted chip. Our best guess is that it was abandoned; it's extremely sweet and well socialized to humans.

The little thing has adapted perfectly well to being at the bead shop. So much so that it rides to and from work every day and guards the beads for us while the shop is open.

(That's Steve from Sharon's Attic next door.) Yup, Martha's perfectly at home at the bead store, and the customers seem to just love it as well.

Look at the beads skitter!

What Can I Say?

2008-06-16T12:45:00.001-07:00

I love Portland. I really do. With the mildest climate in the 48 states, plentiful clean water and air, and people who actually care that we have plentiful clean water and air, I'm glad to call this my home.

But...sometimes people are just weird here.

Check out this news article from the weekend. Umm. Yeah. The thought of riding a bike without any clothes on kinda makes my hide twitch. A positive and health bicycling culture has a lot of great side effects. However, there are some things that happen here that I really don't get, like
shift2bikes, the Zoobombers, and Critical Mass, not to mention the really fringey things like Dykes on Bikes.

Honestly, this place is so weird even the UFO's don't land here any more. (No, I didn't make that up, but I do have it on good authority from the extraterrestrial I had over for dinner the other night.) Recall that King George the First termed this place Little Beirut because it was such a tribulation for the the secret service to keep him alive when he visited here?

I can't even presume that the Willamette Valley got this way since I moved here. Remember this bumper sticker?
(I'm distancing the population west of the Cascades from everyone else, because I think the folks in Bend, Pendleton, and LaGrande would prefer it that way .) Heck, I usually buy Nancy's yogurt at the store (I'm lactose intolerant), and--in case you weren't aware--this is a daily reminder in my life of the legacy of Ken Kesey. Yes, it's that Kesey family that owns it. And I buy Nancy's because they don't add nonfat milk solids (read: lactose) into their yogurt after they culture it, and they don't add gelatin (read: makes it hard to cook with). It's just plain better.

Want another example? We had our Gay Pride Parade here in Portland over the weekend, and who's prominently featured in a float?

Yup, Sam Adams. And in Portland that's not just the name of a nationally renowned (and revered even here in the land of microbrews) ale; Mr. Adams is none other than the mayor-elect of Portland.

Sam Adams is also an ardent advocate for bicyclists. He even wanted to relocate the Sauvie Island bridge to make a pedestrian overpass in the Pearl District, but that's another story.

So, anyway, that's the news from the Land of the Stumps of Mystery as of today.

Saturday was another epic bicycle ride for the Oregon Randonneurs. You had your choice of a 200km and a 400km route. Those who opted for the 400km tended to finish around 2 AM Sunday, and...seeing as it was Father's Day, I didn't think that was politically correct. Yeah, that's the ticket. That's why I didn't do it.

The worst part about this ride for me was actually starting it. In order to afford the riders with the maximum amount of daylight, we were to start in Newburg at six in the morning, which meant rolling out of bed at four. I spent the entire trip to Newburg wondering how I was going to feel being on a bike. I like my sleep!

The upside is that the weather was absolutely fantastic. It started out just chilly enough to require a windbreaker, but we were down to arm & leg warmers by lunch and then we were out of those by the return trip.

Yes, we had to bypass the Road to Riches in order to stay on our route. So shoot me. (See how blue and clear the sky was!)

However, it was just after I took this photo that, heading southbound down a hill at 15 mph, I noticed that I was feeling absolutely no wind. Bad news, boys and girls. I told myself that the wind would probably die down before heading back north.

As the morning progressed we got our obligatory covered bridges. The last one ended up being blurry, sorry about that.

The descent to Shimanek Bridge was most notable. Even taking it easy I hit 42 mph dropping down to the bridge.

You have to wonder why there are covered bridges here in western Oregon. It's not as though we get that much snow or sleet in the winter. Must be something about the settlers who moved here. The 400Km folks got the other four bridges. Thanks, I'll do that some other year.

Lynne and I called this ride the Dies the Fire ride. At one point just north of Sublimity as we crested a roller, I said "Hey, Lynne, I keep expecting Clan MacKenzie to ride out from behind some trees; this is exactly like the terrain Sterling writes about." Lynne: "This is the terrain!" (Those are terrific books, by the way; check them out.) We kept speculating where the Lord Protector had put is fortresses, and we all agreed that the only way to tour Dies the Fire country is by foot, horseback, or bicycle (the way they travel in the books).

Cecil and the preride crew had warned us about Cole School Road, but it still has to be experienced to be believed. It consists of two climbs; the first one is 15% and perhaps 0.3 miles. It's pretty demanding, then you get a all-too-swift descent paycheck before starting a second climb of similar length. Let me tell you, that climb looks awful impressive at the bottom, and Cecil assures us that it measures 18%. What's the difference between 15% and 18%? Well, at least for me, visualize climbing, standing, in your lowest gear. On the 18% grade your foot gets absolutely no free ride as you shift your weight between the left and right foot; the bike snakes forward for the pedal stroke and is pretty much motionless as you pull the other foot around and then down.

This was also the point in the ride where my derailleur started acting hinky, which was a big worry for the remainder of the day; I kept adding tension to the cable and it kept acting like it was stretching out. I probably gave the adjust two full turns during the course of the day: a twist would make things behave for about an hour and then I'd start getting phantom shifts. Of course it has to happen when I'm literally hours from home.

In Scio we caught a huge herd of randonneurs who were fueling up, including Natalie "Sweetpea" Ramsland and Mr. Sweetpea (Austin). This was where the 200Km and 400Km riders parted ways. We saw a helmet there that had us scratching our head. I'm pretty sure it didn't belong to one of our crowd, but you can't quite be sure...

After stopping at the Sentry Market in Jefferson for the jo-jo's that Lynne raved about...well, that's when it got...grim. We were aimed northward for pretty much the remainder of the day, and no, the wind had not died down. Can you say "ride on the drops?" There, I knew you could! The sap-the-will-to-live moment came, at least for me, when we struck north on Howell Prairie Road. What part of "north", "eighteen miles", and "prairie" isn't clear?

By the time we got to Champoeg Park I could smell the barn. I'd never realized how close Champoeg is to Newberg. My bike rides always come in from the east and, of course, why would you go through Newberg when you have all of the rest of that beautiful scenery in Yamhill County you could be riding through instead?

Total for the day: 128 miles, 9:05 in-saddle, 11:10 elapsed. My HRM says I burned about 7100 Calories, so I "ate with impunity" that night and slept like a log.

Oregon is a Great Place to Live...

2008-06-07T13:59:00.000-07:00

Check out this DJ's rant in Sioux Falls a couple of weeks ago, transcribed by The MinusCar Project with links to the DJ's voice.

We had a similar issue here in Portland a couple of years ago. Here in Portland, where the UFO's don't land any more because it's so weird, the DJ was excoriated, the radio station issued a public apology, and I believe that there was even a charitable donation by one or more of the offending parties.

Sometimes I forget what it must be like to live in the real world.

New Wearable Feedbags Let Americans Eat More, Move Less

Chinese Have Small and Limp You-Know-What's

2008-06-02T15:42:00.000-07:00

In the last four days I have received approximately 600 e-mails that all look more or less of the form,

From Genuine Cialis/Viagra
To someone_random@verizon.net
Subject Client Privelaged: Reminder

YOUR RENEWAL REMINDER FOR JUNE >> PLEASE RENEW NOW

Dear Valued Customer,

We have not been able to reach you.
We have sent the notice below several
times. This will be your last opportunity
to act upon the special offer being presented.

To take advantage of this savings offer, all
you need to do is renew your order through the
official authentic website. Customers using this
method are saving more. We now encourage all
customers to use this secure option for optimal
savings. Thank you.

Warm Regards,
Brian D. Meloche, Renewal Services
Corporate Offices, NY, NY, US

http://myrenewremind.com

This will be good to discuss.Very safe encrypted Message is inbox.Normal Message has been approved.This message has been scanned and is approvedSpecial safety notice, OK.Very safe encrypted Message is inbox.Great opportunity Very safe encrypted Message is inbox.Special safety notice, OK.

With the cooperation of my ISP, I no longer get these messages (they're truncated at the mail server so that they no longer appear on my desktop). However, I got curious and did some research on the mentioned domain (data courtesy of whois.net):

[whois.paycenter.com.cn]
The Data in Paycenter's WHOIS database is provided by Paycenter
for information purposes, and to assist persons in obtaining
information about or related to a domain name registration
record.
Paycenter does not guarantee its accuracy.  By submitting
a WHOIS query, you agree that you will use this Data only
for lawful purposes and that, under no circumstances will
you use this Data to:
(1) allow, enable, or otherwise support the transmission
of mass unsolicited, commercial advertising or solicitations
via e-mail (spam); or
(2) enable high volume, automated, electronic processes that
apply to Paycenter or its systems.
Paycenter reserves the right to modify these terms at any time.
By submitting this query, you agree to abide by this policy.
  
Domain Name:myrenewremind.com


Registrant:
Shichun Wang
NO.47,hepinnanlu street,kunmin City,yunnan Province
346892



Administrative Contact:
WangShichun
Shichun Wang
NO.47,hepinnanlu street,kunmin City,yunnan Province
kunming Yunnan 346892
CN
tel:  871 3522632
fax:  871 3523779
yayun22@163.com

Technical Contact:
WangShichun
Shichun Wang
NO.47,hepinnanlu street,kunmin City,yunnan Province
kunming Yunnan 346892
CN
tel:   3522632
fax:   3523779
yayun22@163.com

Billing Contact:
WangShichun
Shichun Wang
NO.47,hepinnanlu street,kunmin City,yunnan Province
kunming Yunnan 346892
CN
tel:   3522632
fax:   3523779
yayun22@163.com

Registration Date: 2008-05-30
    Update Date: 2008-05-30
Expiration Date: 2009-05-30

 Primary DNS:  ns1.trieante.com  124.236.241.91
Secondary DNS:  ns2.trieante.com  221.122.67.149

I have a message for you dorks in Yunnan Province:

If you're getting paid by the number of delivered messages, your clients are getting ripped off. Verizon silently eats your messages and we customers never see them. You cannot use the fact that a mail message doesn't bounce as any sort of indication that your message has been successfully delivered.
It's clear, due to your preoccupation with certain body parts, that you have an epidemic of limp and undersized ones in China, and my sympathy goes out to you.
Your small and limp body parts have affected your brain if you think Americans will send money overseas to a web site that does not have HTTPS and a valid certificate authority when I need to proffer a credit card, especially when you used dishonest means to put your message in my inbox to begin with.
It furthers my opinion that Chinese goods are only safe if they are not to be ingested or given to children, since they have obviously affected your virility and intelligence.

Get a clue, guys!

P.S. -- Your spell checking is as atrocious as your grammar and your ethics. "Privelaged"? Sheesh.

Praise for my Girlfriend

2008-06-02T10:52:00.000-07:00

Here's an aside before writing on the topic of the day. My allergist's offices are located in a late-20th-century blah office park adjacent to the local hospital, at the top of the nearby hill. Ever since I went car-light at the beginning of November, I've been biking up there about every two weeks, where I willingly subject myself to subdermal injections of a poison personally designed to do me the most harm. After the nurses watch me for twenty minutes to root and cheer if I keel over from anaphalactic shock, I then bike to work...gently, so as not to spread the poison through my veins too quickly.

Well, there's a perfectly decent bike rack near the parking garage that I always use. (Note: property owners haven't quite figured out that bike racks work a lot better if there's access from both sides, but this one isn't as bad as most.) Anyway, for the last seven months I've always been the only bike in the bike rack. Until today.

So, about my girlfriend. My sweetie is so affectionate. She's always happy to see me, even if I have to accept her affection on her terms. She comes and snuggles up to me every night. I've never had a girlfriend like this. Just don't try to trim her nails!

Rita came to our family the summer after we were married. My mother-in-law tends after the feral cats in her neighborhood outside of Pittsburgh, PA. Rita's mother was feral (and was eventually neutered). Rita has always been a bit fierce, presumably because of the slight admixture of Maine Coon in her background. (Maine Coon evidently is a domestic breed which in itself includes a tiny bit of American Bobcat.)

Our very first Thanksgiving, our three pound cat attacked and landed the 25 pound Thanksgiving turkey, and growled at any of us who tried to get near it. The year after that, one morning I went to the pantry to get breakfast and saw my kitty totally on point, crouched, tail down and switching, head down, intensely focused on the floor of the pantry. I sensed something was up (hey, there's a reason humans are the most dangerous predators on the planet), so I started removing bins from the pantry and setting them outside. All of a sudden, Rita pounced and came up with a baby field mouse! (Of course, she promptly went into the girls' bedroom and promptly dropped it, causing no amount of terror and shrieking from said bedroom.)

Last summer, Rachel suggested that we get the cats trimmed for the summer. The groomer does this thing called a "lion cut", where they trim all the fur except around the head and paws. We took Rita and both calicoes in to have this done. When we got the kitties back, I had an extra bill for general anaesthesia--for Rita. Funny, calicoes have the reputation for "ripping your face off" as one veterinary assistant put it, but Rita was the one that caused all the trouble. The groomer even called the veterinarian in to help out, but even he ended up in fear of getting bitten.

My ferocious girlfriend. Of course, it's her bed that she lets me sleep on, but she doesn't begrudge me. I've never had a cat that's been this rewarding. She turns twelve years old this month, and she's showing her age. I'll really miss her when she passes away.

Bicycle Thief

2008-05-25T21:04:00.000-07:00

Start with the classic video

The one everyone thinks about nowadays...

But hey, things are just as bad in the Land of the Stumps of Mystery:

And, how you wish it were:

(Of course the Sprockettes are a Portland legend...)

T plus One Week

2008-05-25T10:47:00.000-07:00

All the authorities say that you should expect T therapy to show results after about three weeks. This seems really reasonable to me. Even in this era of fiber optic Internet, PayPal, and instant gratification, some things just take some time.

Nevertheless, I've seen some interesting psychological changes even in the short time since my one injection.

I guess the first thing I noticed was the morning after my injection, hanging around waiting for everyone to get ready to start our English century. I saw an acquaintance walk up with my friend, and the unbidden thought, "hey, she's pretty!" came to mind. Not that I ever lost my appreciation for the fairer sex, I just didn't...care.

About four days later I was sitting in a deli when an attractive woman walked in and my eyes tracked her as she walked up to the counter. Guys, you know what I'm talking about. It's pretty much involuntary, sort of like sneezing. Your girlfriend/wife hates it and thinks there's something wrong with you. You and I know it's just part of a normal healthy well-adjusted adult man. Only I'm guessing it's been somewhere between six months and a year since the last time it's happened to me.

As of today I'd call my sex drive "low normal", which is to say that I would be satisfied and could cope if it stayed at this level. It really does feel like it's come back after a hiatus, so things really aren't "normal" yet. I'll call it normal after it's stabilized for a period of time.

My mood has also improved. Toward the end of the week I found myself just grinning for no reason. Not that I'm that downbeat in general, but I could tell that I was just in a really good mood. I wouldn't characterize it as "manic"; the pshrinks use that term when your elevated mood interferes with your life. I was definitely more productive than I'd been in a few months.

Late in the week we had a fairly active meeting at my work. At one point a woman (a terrifically bright engineer and a competitive bicyclist to boot) asked a question and about two other workers (men) talked over her so her question got drowned out. I wanted to hear her question and the answer.

ONE MEETING! I yelled. (That's an Intel term by the way when there's too much side talking so that ideas are getting lost.) Embarrassed silence. Not the least of which was myself. I belatedly realized I'd just out-testosterone'd everyone in the room. Oops. At least it was in the defense of the testosterone impaired.

Towards the end of the week: I was eyeing this woman I was familiar with, one that I really enjoy looking at since I see her around regularly. (Such a simple pleasure in life!) I got a shock. Eewww!! Yucch! How did I ever think she was attractive?

This was a definite surprise. Over the last oh, five or ten years I've gotten a lot more universal in my appreciation of women. My understanding is that this is pretty common in men as they get older, and I've considered it a side benefit of being married: I don't have to be picky or choosy in my appreciation of women. I can enjoy them all since there's absolutely no intent and no decisions to be made. I don't remember being so picky about women since my early 30's. I'm not characterizing this as good or bad, I'm just reporting it.

Moving away from mood issues, the injection site was sore for about three days. I really didn't like it being achy for so long. Part of it might have been all the biking on Saturday. However, I think I may have had some weight on my leg when I got the injection. I will make a point of relaxing that muscle before the next shot to see what happens.

After my English century, I noted that my resting heart rate (RHR) was in the high 70's. This seemed a bit high, so I've been waiting for it to go back down, and it hasn't dropped to its previous levels. That's the one interesting physical effect so far. Allow me to explain that my RHR is higher than average, and my physician says a lot of that is genetically predetermined. However, since I've started biking I saw it drop into the low 60's, and in the last year or so I've seen it drop into the low 50's. Since the injection it's now somewhere in the mid 60's. I now suspect that my metabolism was starting to tank. Perhaps now I can start to lose some of that weight I've gained in the last three years.

The bottom line is that so far I'm very pleased with the treatment. We have to be very careful that my blood doesn't turn into molasses due to overproduction of red blood cells, and other serious physical side effects are still possible. However, I am very optimistic that this is going to mean a significant improvement in my quality of life.

I even found out that my bicycle racing aspirations might not be over. There is a procedure called a "therapeutic use exemption" by which I can get formal dispensation to allow me to race even though I'm receiving treatment. Of course, it's way too early to consider it. I need to adjust to the treatment and lose about fifteen pounds. Also, there's no guarantee that USADA will grant it; I'll have to demonstrate that I'm not enjoying an unfair advantage because I'm being treated. But, hey, perhaps I'll be able to get back on the race team!

Like an old car...

2008-05-20T11:47:00.000-07:00

So, I'm still having fun and games with the doctors. It's so much like a used car: the older it gets, the more "quirks" it has and the more maintenance it takes to keep it running. If I had a choice, I think I'd start considering trading this one in while it's still reliable :-)

No news on the MRI. That doctor is pretty busy, but I think I'm not high on his list because, frankly, it's not an imminent danger. The stress did give me a sinus infection, but I'm recovering from that finally.

Friday was absolutely beautiful California lotus-eater weather, highs in the low 80's, beautiful sunshine.

I rode to the doctor's office and then to work in shorts and short sleeves, had a hard time concentrating while indoors. At the doctor's office we discussed my hypogonadism. He started by discussing therapy options, and I interrupted him:

"So, have we done our due diligence to determine the cause?"
"Yes, it's primary testicular failure. Your pituitary hormone levels are not low enough to cause this."

Hmmm....I'd put together this entire explanation involving a concussion I'd had to explain what's happened to me, and the truth is actually even more chilling: Things wear out. I guess if ovaries can give it up, causing menopause, then it's not outside the realm of reason that male andropause can have a relatively sudden onset. You just don't think of your body giving out on you. Another sobering moment that I'm still processing.

We discussed treatment options. He started by listing all the benefits of T therapy: increased energy, increased mental clarity, better bone density, increased muscle mass, reduced body fat percentage, increased interest and performance sexually.

I laughed and asked "Where do I sign up?" Seriously, I'm an athlete, so I think the perceived benefits might actually be greater for me than for a Joe "Budweiser" Sixpack with the fastest TV remote in the West. "I want to hear about the risks and how we manage them."

The bottom line is that we'll have to do quite a bit of monitoring at first to look for acute side effects, reducing the blood draws after we're certain that I'm stable. Next we discussed the different types of therapy. Basically, how does one administer it? Options include pills, shots, patches (either dermal or buccal (gums)), or a cream. BTW they all suck for different reasons. Doc knew I'd done a bit of research on this, so he asked for my opinion.

"Well, the only one that I'm dead set against is oral." He started smiling as I finished the sentence: "We don't even offer that in our practice." (When you ingest T 90% of it gets snagged by the liver and kidneys without making it to the blood stream, and that 90% proceeds to cause measurable hepatic and renal abnormalities. Not acceptable if I'm going to be on it for 20 years.)

"The problem with cream is that it's not a good fit with my lifestyle [you're supposed to use it in the morning and then not shower for five hours--that kinda screws up my lunchtime run], and I've seen reports that it increases the DHT to T ratio in your bloodstream, so it's probably not a good match for me." He smiled again: I've done my research! DHT is a metabolic byproduct of T, and though it's a necessary hormone, higher levels are implicated in BPH, from which I already suffer mildly.

"So, that leaves injections and patches. What's your experience with these?"

"Although patches should theoretically be superior, I've not seen any advantage in my practice, and they are considerably more expensive."

So, I'm trying the injections. Since they're two weeks apart, I'm going to get the injections at his office,e though I could theoretically start administering them myself after everything is stable.

That afternoon I went by and got my first injection. Just call me Floyd Landis now. (I'm not even assuming that he's innocent, but more on that later.) It's an IM (intramuscular) injection, so the clinic nurse picked the biggest muscle I've got. Yup, the gluteus maximus. Oh, and that sucker hurt. I felt a wasp sting and then she said she was done. Wasp sting? Heck, make that a yellowjacket. "You are?" It felt like she'd broken off the needle and left it in there.

The rest of the afternoon was a minor panic. I had to get the Montero serviced to prepare it for Clarkie and Rachel to drive it to the beach. Then I had to go home, pack, and prepare my bike for Reach the Beach.

Saturday morning came way too early at 5 AM. I went out to get the newspaper and saw that the weather was going to be gorgeous. I opted for arm warmers, but not even a skullcap or leg warmers. After an insufficient amount of coffee, I tiptoed out of the house and rode about three miles towards the RTB starting point and waited for Cecil and Lynne to show up. We rode the rest of the way to the starting point without incident...though Lynne's back route on SW 150th Avenue is definitely not any flatter than staying on Murray down to Scholls. Hey, it says "Hills are my Friends" right on my RoadID.

It's always a good idea to ride down to the RTB starting point. The congestion and traffic at the new staging area is even worse than it was at the old middle school. Diving in and out using a bicycle is the right way to go. We managed to get on the road around 7:15 and found ourselves in the middle of the thick pack. Lynne got caught by traffic early on, so it was just Cecil and me for about 45 minutes. Then I looked back and saw Cecil wasn't there either. "She must have decided to stick with Lynne." I figured I'd hang with Lynne in the afternoon, but I wanted to put a few miles in while I was fresh and the weather was cool.

I waited at a rest stop for them to show up and then stayed closer for the rest of the day. Cecil told me that she hadn't dropped back by choice; I'd flat out dropped her. That was when I had to 'fess up: "Cecil, just call me Floyd Landis." Lynne and Cecil both got a kick out of that. After all, it is "The Rabbit Formerly Known as Floyd" who sits on top of her Carradice bag!

The temperature was steadily rising all morning. Now, I don't have any warm weather acclimation yet, so I was very worried about how much water I was drinking. I don't think I've ever been so diligent about my water. Through the entire day I probably drank something on the order of a gallon of water.

When we left Sheridan we got our first hint of what the afternoon was going to be like. As we crossed the river and turned west, BAM the headwind hit us. Can you say "onshore flow?" There. I knew could. The air was cooler, which was a welcome relief. In Sheridan it was almost 90 degrees F, and as the rest of the day progressed it got cooler. However, whenever we weren't sheltered by hills, the wind was strong. Our friend Edna relates a report that it was around 35 mph in Grand Ronde.

The climb into Pacific City had a pleasant surprise. The last two years the locals marked off the bike lane on the wrong side of the road (the "cones of death" as Cecil calls them) and had us climbing Brooten Road facing oncoming motor traffic. This year I think they must have heard us, because they just made Brooten one way. We were still on the wrong side of the road, but with an entire lane to ourselves I can live with that. The finish line at the Pelican Pub was pleasant and sunny, temperature in the low 70's. We had food and beer, then headed for the rental house.

This house belongs to a friend of Clarkie's friend. It has absolute perfect location near the beach. It's very charming with room for seven, and we filled it. There was a hot tub, books, VCR/DVD, and a jigsaw puzzle that Rachel promptly dumped on the floor and started. We all went our separate ways for dinner (the three of us had a wonderful seafood dinner at our favorite restaurant there) and then us cyclists collapsed. Rachel and Clarkie stayed up and watched a movie, but I have no recollection of this.

Next morning I saw Diane, Lynne, and Cecil off bright and early; they had planned an Unreach the Beach, making it a 200+ mile weekend. (The Unreach is an unsupported unofficial route that many of us enjoy. Lynne and I did our own a few years ago when Clarkie couldn't make it; we carried our overnight gear in panniers and rode back with Diane on Sunday.)

I knew from the way I'd been feeling that I wasn't up for an Unreach, and I wanted to hang out with my family that weekend anyway. Ron's family came by later to rescue him. When my girls finally got up we had a very pleasant and leisurely breakfast at The Grateful Bread. Rachel: "Was the Grateful Dead some sort of hippie band?" After we managed to stop laughing, we confirmed that and asked her how she guessed that. "All of the workers are wearing tie-dye shirts."

We got back into town just before dinner, dropped off everyone's bags at Lynne's (we portered their overnight gear which served everyone well), and had a very relaxed evening.

The short term effects of the T injection have been interesting. Of course I don't expect any substantive changes for three or four weeks, but as of this morning I'm certain that the mental effects are taking effect. Did the shot actually make me faster on Saturday? Hey, maybe so, but that's arguable. Am I noticing pretty women more now? Hell yes! And that's really what I want to end with here.

It's a biological fact that men live with the incessant effects of testosterone since before we are mentally mature. It's a constant drone, every moment, waking and sleeping. It seems like a large part, for a man, of growing up emotionally is learning how to function with this constant noise trickling in from the cerebellum. Having lived without that solid backdrop for about a year, I want to try to provide some insight, for both men and women, of what the difference is like.

I'm going to make an analogy here to eating. When I tried to explain this to my wife, she was puzzled, "but you need to eat in order to live." Yes, but your cerebellum, the reptilian part of the brain, doesn't reason like that. Eat, sleep, breathe, reproduce. These are all basic urges generated by the same part of the brain.

So suppose one day you discovered that you just weren't hungry any more. Just didn't feel the urge any more, and you didn't really need to eat. Not only that, when you did eat, you didn't really enjoy it that much any more? Not that you couldn't eat, you just didn't have any enthusiasm for it? Not interested in smelling it, looking at it, talking about it. No interest in making time for it, making any effort to do it?

That's kinda how it is. And, to continue the analogy above, I saw it as a genuine quality of life issue. I like to eat. It's a great part of life. It also has a significant social aspect. Finally, what the dickens happened that I lost interest in eating? Yeah, that's kinda how it is.

So back to the mental effects. Last night there were erotic elements in my dreams. I can't even remember the last time that happened. And this morning, in the bagel shop, my eyes were tracking the pretty women. Excuse me? This isn't a conscious thing. Don't tell me there's something wrong with me; that's normal healthy male response. It's what men say and do that they need to be held accountable for; the visual response is down there in the cerebellum again.

I guess the last thing I want to say is, if this is the way women are normally, it's a good thing men have testosterone or else no one would ever get laid. It gives me a new insight into what men contribute to a healthy marriage, and I hope I've given you some insights as well.

Naww, that's not an optical illusion...is it?

2008-05-15T16:14:00.000-07:00

Which way is the dancer spinning?

I stared at this for about ten minutes before I could see it both ways. I was just about ready to call in a neighbor to tell me that this was a bunch of horse manure when...she started spinning the other way.

Go here for the full article...

On Mortality...

2008-05-12T21:48:00.000-07:00

I've spent a week thinking about a very old and profound subject. I know I should write about it, but I've hesitated. It seems like everything I could say would be so trite, and so many philosophers and poets have written about it...what could I possibly add? So, I've decided to limit it to my personal observations and what has jumped out at me.

The one thing I start with is my gradual appreciation of my mortality; you know, "we're only immortal for a limited time." That our time here is limited, and that things must end. As I enter my 50's, I feel like I have a good grasp of that, at least intellectually.

The other thing I've been thinking about before all of my latest scares is that your body is a lot like a car. As it gets older, it gets more quirks. It needs more maintenance, more care, and it just doesn't run as well.

So, the MRI results had two things in it that got me to really thinking. Oh, the good news? My pituitary is healthy. No tumor, not even anything nearby. The bad news? A strange "blip" in a ventricle of my brain. Oh, and there's some brain damage in my parietal lobe. It could be an ependymoma (a kind of brain cancer)?

So, here I am looking at one radiologist's assessment, that suggests that if the brain cancer doesn't get me, the Alzheimer's will. (Did I mention that my father's mother died of Alzheimer's?) I had to cogitate on these results for bout a day before hearing a neurosurgeon's opinion on that same MRI.

During that time, I realized that not only does our body change (wear out) over time, we ourselves change in a profound manner. If my brain changes, am I even the same person? It reflects life as a changing experience, where our circumstances and our outlook are never the same twice. My testosterone is really low now, and I see the attitudinal changes. It will change back when I (finally) get some treatment. Who am I, really? Fortunately I don't define myself through my sex drive, but the last few months have given me a significantly different way to view myself.

Suppose I only had an 80% chance of living five years. What is my legacy? What will people remember me for? God, I know it sounds trite, but what will people remember about me 25 years later? (No, I'm not going to answer that here .)

Finally, I heard once that death is truly lonely; that no matter what else happens beforehand, it is quintessentially a solitary experience. I see that now.

P.S. -- the neurosurgeon says that the parietal lobe damage is consistent with ischemic disease i.e., aging. The blip? He says it's not consistent with any common pathology, so he wants more tests. I've decided I can't worry about it; I'll just take the tests and see what happens.

Taking the Lane

2008-05-08T10:32:00.000-07:00

About a month ago I was discussing a difficult traffic situation with Hal Ballard. I was concerned about how closely people passed me when there really wasn't any room to share the lane safely another vehicle. He asked about my lane position, and said that was the problem.

"You need to take the lane."

Note that Hal is a League of American Bicyclists LCI (League Certified Instructor). The LAB is fairly far over in the Vehicular Cycling camp, which doesn't bother me, but this advice was somewhat more aggressive than I had been willing to practice.

Over the last month I've been trying to apply his advice, trying to learn the appropriate application of circumstances, caution, and courtesy. It's been a learning experience for me, but overall I've concluded he's right. Motorists are occasionally surprised, but it seems to me that they seem to understand what I'm doing. I want to share some of the things I've learned.

Westbound Barnes Road to Southbound Cedar Hills Boulevard

View Larger Map

This intersection is important to me because of the shopping center southeast of the light. For the last several months, I've made my left turn by proceeding in the right-most turn lane (of course), and then hugging the right side of the through lane until I could enter the shoulder. I've had a number of scary moments, including one where a motorist cut me off trying to get around me to get onto US-26.

For the last month I've started staying fully 75% over from the right hand side of the lane, requiring motorists to either stay behind me or to move over into the next lane. This actually allows motorists to get onto the US-26 ramp earlier though it requires southbound through traffic to wait for me. In practice, I've been surprised at how well it works. Southbound motorists either wait behind me until I'm on the shoulder or find an opportunity to move into the left lane.

Blind Corner on Butner Road

View Larger Map

This is a blind turn with no shoulders. I've found that if I drift out into the lane well before the turn, I can prevent people from taking their lives (and mine) into their hands as they swing around the corner. Eastbound in the evenings, I find a lot of heavy westbound traffic, so I often stay in the lane all the way to SW 130th Avenue.

Narrow Two Lane Bridge

View Larger Map

There is a creek that parallels 126th Ave and empties into Lake Commonwealth. The road as it passes over the bridge is so narrow that pedestrians are instructed to take the walkway (visible on the south side of the street). There is a lot of traffic in both directions. When I take the lane before the bridge, I keep people trying to pass me on the bridge itself with oncoming traffic.

Cedar Hills Boulevard Between Hall and Walker

View Larger Map

This is a really difficult stretch of road. I can usually avoid this length (either by taking SW Hocken or SW 123rd), but sometimes it is downright necessary, especially if I'm coming in from Old Beaverton. The challenge here is that there is absolutely no bike lane. However, there are two traffic lanes. Traffic is very fast (35 mph). By taking the lane here, I prevent people from buzzing me so close I feel the wind as they go by.

Hungarian PSA

2008-05-07T14:50:00.000-07:00

It's a shame you could never put this public service announcement on the air in this country.

Warning: use headphones if you're at work!

Here is a translation of the dialog (though it's not really needed):

Text on biker lady’s bag: "Bike to Work"

Woman: "Would you like some tea?
Man: "Thank you, that would be lovely."

As she is listening to the noises coming from the other room, woman mutters under her breath: “you should rather be biking, too, Rezso”.

Tag line at the end is almost the same: "You should rather be biking, too", or more literally, "Ride your bike instead as well".

Originally from osocio.org

There are irregularities in my MRI. My primary care physician thinks it might just be related to my head injury, but she wants a specialist to review the results. More information on Friday. More stress and worrying. (Did I mention I'm prone to anxiety?)

Drive Your Bike!

2008-05-05T16:23:00.001-07:00

Had my MRI done today. Ain't medical technology wonderful? Now I just have to wait for the doctor to call me on Wednesday.

Cecil published a cute link on her latest blog. I'm going to add what may be the very first Vehicular Cycling media ever made. Enjoy!

Health Issues

2008-05-02T22:21:00.000-07:00

I'm having a serious medical issue, and I think it's time to share it with you. It's
been building for some time, and I've finally figured out what's going on.

You know, when I lay it out here it's going to seem really obvious to you, but life
really isn't so cut-and-dry. There are events that happen every day that we don't pay
attention to, or dismiss as not pertinent. So, when I distill out the basic facts, it's
going to seem really obvious to you, so I'm going to try to walk you through the
confusing steps so you can see how I arrived at this.

When it comes to ignoring physical symptoms, I believe men are more likely to dismiss things about their bodies than women. Women identify with their bodies, and we are more likely to judge them by their appearance. Men are more likely to regard their body like a pair of sneakers: something you value and take care of, but not something you worry a lot about.

So...I think I'll start the story last October (2007) when I went for my annual physical. My doctor told me I was really healthy, which was good news. But...

"Hey, it feels like my sexual libido is a bit low."
"OK, let's order a testosterone test."

When the T results came back, they were low-ish, but within normal range. My libido was low, but hey, don't fix it if it ain't broke, right? After all, I *am* 50 years old, so I shouldn't expect to act and feel the way I did when I was in my 20's, right?

Well, over the winter my libido dropped significantly further. Whereas last fall I would have given it a "3" on a scale of 10, where 10 was how I was as a crazed 14 year old teenager, it dropped to somewhere just above a "1".

I went back to my doctor, and took another T test. This time it came in *below* normal.

"Ah-HAH!" I thought. "Looks like things might be wearing out."

I told my doctor that I wanted to do our due diligence, to try to figure out *why* my T had gone low, so he ordered another test. This time he wanted to see if my pituitary was screaming like mad at my gonads to create testosterone and they weren't producing, or if something was wrong further upstream. So, he ordered the FS/LH/Prolactin measurement, and there I was, back at the lab giving more blood.

As I waited for the blood results, I started thinking about my athletic performance over the last year. Low testosterone is *so* nonspecific. I spent the late part of the winter running as well as biking and dieting, and my weight wouldn't go very far down.

But, hey, I'm 50 years old, right?

My running never seemed to get much faster, but I just figured that I'm not much of a runner. But I never seemed to be able to affect my strength or my speed much.

I've spent all fall and winter biking, but I don't feel much stronger. And my strength training in the gym has been...insipid.

When I did the Birkenfeld brevet, it seems like it took an extra day or two for me to recover.

I had a serious phase about three weeks ago where I was incredibly *grumpy*. I mean, I have some cool little pink pills I take for anxiety and OCD, but this was very different. I upped my dose of the little pink pills, but all that happened was that it made me sleepy.

A couple of days this last blood test, I woke up at about four in the morning. Usually I have to make a trip to the bathroom about once a night, but I noticed that I was covered in a cold sweat. And, I recalled this had happened the previous night as well, and that I'd had this happen very occasionally over the last few months.

Hot flashes! (Insert menopausal woman joke here.)

So, I called the doctor's office yesterday, anxious to hear the results of the blood work. Hey, if I need testerone replacement therapy, I want to get on with it.

The FSH/LH levels were low.

They've ordered an MRI scan to look for a brain tumor, which I'll have Monday, and the doctor will consult with me on Wednesday.

This is when my Internet research went into high gear. If it is a tumor, I have about an 80% chance of living another 5 years. Did I mention that I'm prone to anxiety?

Whatever's happening to me, I've fallen off the tail of the bell curve. Pituitary tumors usually cause overproduction of hormones, but*they occasionally cause hypopituitarism. Pituitary tumors usually cause headaches and occasionally visually disturbances, but not always. See what I mean?

So, here's some optimism. One of the causes of hypopituitarism is...head injury. In fact, some endocrinologists estimate that hypopituitarism may present in as many as 25% cases of traumatic brain injury (TBI).

Why is that pertinent? Well, in the summer of 2005 I had concussion in a bicycle fall. I suffered a half minute "gap in the Nixon tapes" (short term memory loss), and I was a bit woozy for about two weeks after that. They scanned my head at that time and determined I wasn't going to die, and after that I didn't think much about it.

But...I think that by the time summer of 2006 rolled around, I was noticing slight effects in terms of my libido.

So, back to the Internet research. One study analyzed about 500 cases of PHTH (post head trauma hypopituitarism) and had a bunch of intriguing statistics. Most patients presented with profound symptoms in less than a year (though there were indeed ones who presented longer after the fact).

Most interesting is that fully ninety percent of these patients had hypogonadism. (The pituitary also generates TH (thyroid hormone), HGH (human growth hormone), and some other thingies I don't remember. They even speculate that the gonadotropic cells in the anterior pituitary may be particularly susceptible to damage.

Again, about 50% of the patients in this study presented symptoms of this really strange thing called diabetes insipidus. Look it up. Never heard of it, it certainly doesn't fit any symptoms I've had. So, here I am, at the tail end of the bell curve.

Now I'm waiting to take the MRI and to get the results. Odd, how I would regard the absence of a brain tumor as good news. They *do* have reasonable treatments for secondary onset hypopituitary hypogonadism. (Ironically, it's generated from the urine of post-menopausal women, who have high FSH and LH levels in their bloodstream.)

But still, it's making me crazy. It's the waiting and not knowing that's the worst.

I See Bicycles

2008-04-30T15:53:00.001-07:00

This is cool enough I had to share. Imagine taking your kid to school in the Netherlands.

Feeling very tired today. I have a health issue; hopefully I'll know more (and can share) in a week or two.

Things Motorists Need to Understand About Cyclists

2008-04-29T16:25:00.000-07:00

(Tanya said it first, but I'm going to paraphrase it, because I think it's important enough to bear repeating.)

Why Do I Ride My Bicycle?

My bicycle is a means of transportation, not a toy. I'm not too poor to afford a car. I'm not a racer (though sometimes I dream of being one.) I choose to ride a bicycle because I save $400 every month, it's healthier for me, better for the environment, and it doesn't put money in the hands of mid-East oil terrorists. When you see me on the road, I'm trying do the same thing you're doing: go to work, the grocery store, the doctor's office, and the parent-teacher meeting.

I know it seems crazy when I'm riding in the rain, in the cold, or in the dark. Most of the time it's pleasant outside, even when the weather doesn't seem "perfect." I'm not the Wicked Witch of the West, so a little rain doesn't hurt, and I'm quite dry underneath my layers. I'm warm as I ride, partly because I'm riding. When it's dark I use lights. Except on the darkest country roads, I can see the roadway by natural lighting; my lights are to make sure that others see me.

I know you think it's dangerous to ride a bike on public roads, but statistically it's three times safer than walking and about five times faster. Oh, and it's also about a hundred times more fun!

Why Am I Riding in the Lane?

If you see me riding in the middle of the lane, it's not because I hate cars and am trying to annoy you, but because the lane is too narrow to safely share it with you. On city streets, people open car doors in front of me (ORS 811.490), so I need to stay far away from parallel parked cars. There are potholes, construction signs, metal rebar, hubcaps, and other obstacles on the shoulder or the bike lane that you might not be able to see. Glass, metal, and other debris can damage my tires and possibly cause me to fall, causing personal injury or even landing me in front of your wheels.

If it seems like I'm "darting into traffic", I have a good reason. It could be a pothole, a huge puddle that could be hiding a pothole, or a piece of debris (ORS 814.430 (2)). Remember, you're traveling much faster than I am and you're sitting behind an engine, so you have neither the time nor the clear line of sight to see the roadway like I do. One special circumstance you need to be aware of: just like a motorcycle, I may choose to weave my bicycle to cross a crack, raised lip, or railroad tracks at a right angle. If I don't do this and a track is the slightest bit slick or rough, I run the risk of falling.

Please don't tell me that I belong on a sidewalk. I have the same rights and responsibilities as other vehicles (ORS 814.400), including the use of the road. There are many restrictions upon riding upon a sidewalk (ORS 814.410), and it is illegal in many cities, including downtown Portland. It is also safer for me and pedestrians if I stay on the roadway. While I'm on the subject, 80% of the costs of the roads are borne through the general fund, so you don't have a special right to the roads because you're in a car; I pay for them too. Remember that the reason motorists need a driver's license and registration as well as pay taxes and insurance is because a car is so dangerous.

I may end up taking a lane depending on the direction I'm traveling. If I've swung out to the far left of the lane, I'm probably about to change lanes or make a left turn (ORS 814.430 (2)(b)). Please think twice before passing me if I've moved from the right. Passing on the right (ORS 811.415) requires as much care as passing on the left; see the next section.

Remember that I am safer if I have both hands on the handlebars. I will give hand signals, but I may put my hands back on the handlebars if I feel need more control over my vehicle (ORS 814.440 (2)).

Please Pass Safely

I'm higher up, in front of you, and traveling slower, all of which means I have a better view of upcoming traffic hazards than you do. If we're at a place like a blind corner where you wouldn't pass someone in a steel cage, I don't want you passing me either. Remember that if you crash while passing me, I will probably also get hurt.

Think about how you would feel if I fell down in front of you while you were passing. It could ruin your whole day. Most states have a law requiring you to leave at least three feet of distance when you go around me. In Oregon, you have to leave enough room so that if I fell towards you, you would completely miss me (ORS 811.065): that pretty much means the entire lane. You really are required to move into the next lane to move around me, and if you don't feel safe doing that, then I don't feel safe having you pass me.

I know you are an expert race car driver with nerves of steel and could squeeze by me with an oncoming car in the next lane. However, when your 2000 pound vehicle passes within mere inches of me at high speed, you are guilty of a Class A misdemeanor (ORS 163.190). This crime has the same punishment as if you struck a total stranger with your fist (ORS 163.160). Are you really that sort of person?

I understand that I am required to yield to you in order to pass (ORS 811.425), and I'm glad to do so when it is safe. You need to understand, however, that this is only if you are proceeding at less than the speed provided by Basic Rule (ORS 811.425 (1)(a)), and Basic Rule includes all of the problems I've been talking about above (visibility (811.100 (1)(e)), road surface (811.100 (1)(b)), or oncoming traffic (811.100 (1)(a))). When I prevent you from passing, I am making it safer for both of us. It's hardly ever the case that you need to wait more than six seconds before you can pass without endangering yourself, the oncoming drivers, or me. Please relax, be patient, and remember that you're only following the law.

When you choose to pass me, you really don't need to blow your horn. It may be hard for you to believe this, but your car is really loud; I'm more likely to know you're there than a motorist would; would you honk your horn to pass a car (ORS 815.225)?

We All Try to Obey Traffic Laws

I know there are bicyclists who behave really badly: they don't use hand signals, run stop lights, ride the wrong way down one way streets, ride without lights at night, and terrorize pedestrians on sidewalks. These bicyclists even scare me. There are also motorists who behave really badly: who have shouted obscenities at me, thrown things out their window at me, and even tried to run me off the road (in Corbett, with witnesses; I called 9-1-1). I always tell myself that it's human nature to remember the ones who behaved badly. (I sure remember that oaf in Corbett!) Please consider that for ever bad driver or cyclist you see, there are a hundred you didn't notice because they behaved well.

If you see me run a stop light, keep in mind that a lot of lights on suburban streets won't change for a vulnerable roadway user (ORS 801.608). My friends are always trying to get these lights fixed, but traffic engineers are reluctant to "slow down" traffic due to "phantom" cars, which is what a bicycle looks like to modern traffic signals. It's no safer for me to push the pedestrian button than it is for you to get out of your car, cross two lanes of traffic, push the button, cross two more lanes of traffic, then get back into your car. Please understand cyclists are left with a terrible choice, and we're trying to cross as safely as we can.

If I'm sitting squarely in the middle of a lane at a traffic light blocking you from making a right turn, I am trying to make the light turn green by positioning my bike over the wire sensor loop. Please don't be impatient; I deserve the same consideration as if I were there in a car waiting for the light to change.

If you roll through a stop sign without coming to a complete stop, I don't get mad, as long as you do it safely and take your proper turn in traffic; please allow me the same consideration.

Also, consider that when I make a mistake in traffic, I am probably the one who will be injured, whereas if you make a mistake, you can end up injuring or killing others. The risks and the consequences are different for for motorists and cyclists, and so cyclists and motorists will operate in traffic differently.

When you offer for me to go through an intersection out of turn, I know you're trying to be nice; it takes a lot of work to start a bicycle up from a stop, and we are less stable at slow speeds. I do appreciate the sentiment, but it really is safer if I cross the intersection when it's my turn. I like it when I can safely do so without stopping, but offering to let me go out of turn will confuse me, the people behind you, and the people behind me; all this makes it less safe. I really am grateful, but please don't do that.

Look for Bicycles

Do you know how most motorcyclists get killed by cars? It's when a car turns left in front of the motorcyclist, violating his right of way. Safety engineers say that motorists don't look for vehicles that are smaller than, well, a car. Please, you need to understand you share the road with other types of traffic, and just because they're too small to hurt you (much) doesn't mean you shouldn't pay attention. I know this sounds obvious, but do the test to see how observant you really are and then come back to finish reading this.

Did you do the test? Seriously, I'll wait...

Bicyclists face the same danger from left turning motorists that motorcyclists do, except we have less power to scoot out of your way. At night I use use lights to try to get your attention, but it won't do any good unless you are looking for me.

Bicyclists have an additional problem that motorcyclists don't have. You know those bicycle lanes that allow you to conveniently ignore the bicyclists on the side of the road? The number two risk to bicyclists is when you pass me going the same direction and then make a right turn in front of me.

Please error on the side of caution when calculating when you can turn (either left or right), and plan ahead: it really doesn't make me feel safer (or make you use less gas) when you race ahead of me and then jam on the brakes with your right turn signal on waiting for me to pass.

If you are planning to make a right hand turn, don't ignore the bike lane. Pay attention well before your turn to see if there is a bike lane and if you might have a conflict with me before starting your turn. Use your turn signal and try to see where I am. If I choose not to pass you, I will try to make my intentions clear by either hanging back or even, if safe, pulling into your lane behind you. If it's legal where you live (not in Oregon), consider slowly entering the bicycle lane before making your right hand turn; as always it's your responsibility to execute the lane change safely.

Motorists have a tendency to underestimate the speed of bicyclists and motorcyclists. In city traffic or downhills it is quite possible that bicyclists are keeping up with traffic, and you shouldn't be surprised if I'm traveling as fast as 30 mph, which, except on open highway, really isn't that much slower than the other vehicles you're waiting for.

Thank You!

To all of you motorists (except the idiot in Corbett):

I know you try really hard to share the road with me, even if you don't understand everything I'm doing. You wait until it's safe to pass, give me plenty of room, and really try to look for me before making a turn. You understand (although sometimes I have to remind you) that perhaps this isn't the safest place to pass, or that I need to change lanes in order to make a left hand turn.

Thank you also for looking out for me when I make a mistake. All of us are human and occasionally forget or choose wrong. For the woman who slowed down when I mistakenly thought she had a stop sign, or the guy who slowed down when I forgot my turn signal, thank you! For the guy who slammed on his brakes when I spaced a traffic light, G*d bless you!

If we all work together, we really can share the roads. I'm your father, your son, your coworker, your husband, your friend; don't think of me as an enemy or an obstacle. Please be safe, and thanks for reading.

ORS 163
ORS 801
ORS 811
ORS 814
ORS 815

Gutsy Gibbon and What's Happened to Our Resolve?

2008-04-27T12:13:00.000-07:00

I had a quiet weekend. The girls were gone to the coast for a bead retreat, leaving me and a near infinite number of cats in the house. After about a day they started getting frantic, since I'm not enough companionship for four of the furry little varmints.

I spent a large part of Saturday upgrading the operating system on three of our computers. Micro$oft has announced that they are "end-of-life"'ing Windows XP, and none of our computers are capable of running Vista: they have neither the memory nor the horsepower for this gargantuan slow OS.

Both Rachel and Clarkie have been running Ubuntu Feisty Fawn (7.04) on their IBM Thinkpads. (These machines are so old that even XP isn't an option, and Windows 2000 was end-of-life'd three years ago, to the great objection to many customers.) I'd been advised that Feisty Fawn is really hard on a laptop's hard disk (bad interleaving? My source wasn't clear), so I wanted to upgrade to Gutsy Gibbon (version 8.04. Where do they come up with these names? What's 9.x going to be? Heroic Horse? The mind boggles).

However, X Windows was also a bear on those machines as well. Clarkie's was the worst: it would appear to run for about five minutes, and then it would freeze. (In all fairness, it turns out this was a hardware bug on the graphics chip that only Linux exposed!) On both machines I had to install it without X windows and then make extremely arcane adjustments (read, software nerd magic) in order to make the graphics work.

I started with upgrading our newer desktop. I'd put OpenSuSE on it a few months ago, and it promptly ate its X-Windows configuration. (Yet another example of the above problems.) Since it still had an XP partition for people who were determined to use the desktop with its DVD burner, I left that as a project best saved for a quiet weekend.

Imagine my pleasure when Ubuntu "just worked". Oh, OK, I had to do it twice, since it (reasonably enough, in retrospect) declined to delete the failed SuSE partition without manual intervention. It even found and installed our two networked print servers without as much as a hiccup.

On to Clarkie's laptop. I wanted to get the worst out of the way, since I had such troubles with it before. It really was harder, since I had to start by backing up her email folder. She had 900 megabytes of email! Accck! She warned me before leaving for the beach that she likes to rummage through her wastebasket and examine deleted items. Sigh.

Anyway, so I used the non-graphic version of the installer, forced a clean install (I really didn't want to see what happened if I tried an upgrade), and clenched various fingers and sphincters when the computer finally rebooted at the end of the install. Imagine my pleasure and surprise when everything "just worked"! Even the wireless internet (which always required manual intervention on her laptop to work after you booted) went in relatively painlessly. Oh, the mail program had a severe bit of indigestion when I imported her old email, but it eventually "came out all right in the end." A little bit of magic ("acpi=force" in the vmlinux options to grub), and it even powers down correctly. That worked, briefly, under Feisty Fawn, but then--to my great annoyance--it autonomously decided (you think Clarkie would play with Linux boot options?) to stop working.

Rachel's was relatively simple. She'd already backed up her many gigabytes of Anime and other things to a shoebox drive, and her email was only 50 megabytes. Also, she's turned into an Ubuntu power user, so I didn't really sweat a lot of the personalization on the other end after the OS got rebuilt. I noticed that even pidgin (the instant message program) is a standard part of the Gutsy Gibbon build; I'd had to install that manually on Feisty Fawn.

I was pleased to discover that Gnome includes graphic support for NTP. No more worries about the computer clocks drifting away from reality. I pointed all of the OS's to a handful of time servers and called it good. Pretty cool!

Another nice touch are some additional login options. I set Clarkie's to automatically log in after ten seconds to her own user account. It turns out that she still has to enter a password; after I made that change it now challenges for a password in order to unlock the magic secret decoder ring for the home wireless network, but I guess that's fair that you have to enter a password sometime if you need access to a secret :-).

Gutsy Gibbon even set the graphics bells and whistles correctly. On the desktop (which is a pretty decent 1.3GHz P4), it enabled a moderate amount of animation in the GUI. It correctly characterized the graphics cards on the Thinkpads as being a short step up from stone knives and bearskins, and disabled it.

Overall I'm extremely pleased with the new Ubuntu. Whereas I would have given Feisty Fawn an overall C- (based on stability and usability), my tentative grade for Gutsy Gibbon is a C+ or possibly even a B-. Microsoft, watch out: not only is the price right (free), but it doesn't require the hardware equivalent of a Hummer H2 in order to run (though if you have one it would just scream with speed.) Finally, with the addition of OpenOffice and Firefox, you end up with a complete deck of cards (which is what Apple keeps bragging is so great about the Macintosh).

Begin soapbox (you didn't think I would stop without one of these, did you?) Have a great day!

I saw another article in the newspaper about people starting to carpool in the Portland area.

(Bill Maher's book looks like a lot of fun, by the way.)

I've heard that during World War II my grandparents faced gas rationing to the tune of 3.5 gallons per week of gasoline per car. (This was to conserve rubber and possibly refining capacity by the way, we weren't an oil importer then.)

Visualize, for a minute, how long 3.5 gallons per week of gasoline would last you, with your current driving habits. Umm, that's not rhetorical. One statistic says that the average American passenger vehicle (excluding buses, trucks and other commercial vehicles) consumed 541 gallons in 2005, or about 10.4 gallons per week.

What's happened to Americans? Every time you pay the enemies of civilization to put fuel in your car, you're paying for bullets to kill American soldiers.

Here's an oxymoron, a "support our troops" magnet on the back of a single-occupant passenger vehicle.

(I wish I could have found this image with a Hummer emblem or some such next to it on the back of a car.)

Car-Free in Seattle?

2008-04-25T16:41:00.000-07:00

I just ran across this interesting blog about a family that went car-free in Seattle.

Very thought-provoking commentaries, and instead of duplicating his thoughts, I'll just refer you there. I particularly like where he writes,

Time spent walking, then, is utterly free. It’s time you would have spent dead.

(He reasons that for about every minute you walk you live about three minutes longer).

Of course, none of this applies to you, does it? I'm sure that the weather where you live is rainier than Seattle. Or that places you have to get to are farther apart than in this west coast city. Or that you get a lot less sunlight than winters above the 45th parallel.

Hey, since it's the motorists that are doing the killing...

2008-04-24T14:52:00.000-07:00

As far as I can tell, this article isn't an April Fool's prank or a tongue-in-cheek jab at motorists. The Dutch Cycling Federation is proposing that motorists install exterior airbags to reduce injuries and deaths to vulnerable roadway users that they collide with.

The next step would be to make motorists more likely to get injured if they strike someone. Perhaps a giant fist that pops out of the steering wheel whenever the exterior airbag deploys. Now that would be progress.

I got my Car-Toons!

2008-04-23T19:11:00.000-07:00

I've said before how much I admire Andy Singer's cartoons. I was looking at his web site last week, and I discovered that if I buy his book, I get the right to use its artwork for noncommercial purposes. It even comes with a CD to make that a lot easier.

Well, I have to admit that I've been web-leeching a lot of the artwork in this blog, but now that I have Andy's artwork, I hope to put a lot of it into my future posts.

I went this afternoon to a doctor's appointment over the hill. They didn't like my urine specimen. Hunh. I can't even pee into a cup correctly? So they took another one. Of course, now there's some anxiety while I wait for the amended results. Otherwise I'm as healthy as a half-century-old horse. Neigh. Whinny.

Earth Day -- Where Were YOU?

2008-04-22T18:40:00.000-07:00

1970. I was 12 years old, going through hell on earth as a seventh grader at Pattie Hillsman Junior High School. I wasn't politically active, and I vaguely recall the event. They gave me a sticker.

Next year when I joined the band, I put the sticker on my musical instrument case. It's still there.

I've never considered myself an active environmentalist. I mean, I'm responsible and accountable, but not really active. Well, until recently. Now it all seems to be coming together, all at once. The Californians seem to have killed off (or significantly damaged) a major fish run. We're getting air pollution warnings here in Oregon because of air pollution in Shanghai. The price of food is skyrocketing, a double whammy based on bad crops (climate change?) and George "Strangle on a Pretzel" Bush's mistaken notion that biofuels will ever make a significant difference in our nation's dependence on foreign oil.

(As an aside, our imports of oil and automobiles constitutes more than all of our current trade deficit. But that's another story.)

So, today at lunch I got to listen to an interesting talk by Bob Mionske. Bob was addressing a group of listeners with the San Francisco BTC, discussing legal issues. (Bikescape is really hit or miss with me; this particular podcast was really interesting.) I was particularly intrigued with a recent (1998) ruling that claimed that bicyclists on Illinois roads are "permitted" but not "intended" (hence jurisdictions are not liable for making the roads dangerous to those of us with a right to the road).

Hmmm...wow, what a concept. Can we get the Oregon legislature to rule that private passenger automobiles are "permitted" but not "intended"? That would send a really clear message to murderists and public planners that they're going down the wrong path.

Similarly, on Earth Day, I've heard that the U.S. government wants to raise fuel efficiency standards. But...35 mpg by 2020? Excuse me? Suppose that 10% of vehicle traffic is service and commercial and the other 90% is by bicycle. If the bicycles get 900 mpg and the other vehicles get 0 mpg, that means that our fleet average could be 800 mpg. 35 mpg seems pretty pitiful. And how is this measly increment supposed to reduce our carbon footprint?

But, I guess that means people would have to turn off their television sets and take care of their bodies. Today, on Earth Day, I'm feeling dubious this will ever happen.

Say What?

2008-04-17T12:29:00.001-07:00

The axes in this graph have been totally cooked by the presenter. The 1951 vehicle miles is about 1800 with a fat rate of say, 24%, while the 1991 vehicle miles is 8000 with a fat rate of about 32%. In other words, quadrupling the vehicle miles resulted in a increase in the overweight population of about 8%. That's not very compelling, even disregarding the difference between correlation and cause/effect.

However, the sharp spike in vehicle miles per capita is absolutely breathtaking. No wonder we feel like we're spending all of our time in a car. No wonder Americans have one of the highest per capita carbon footprints in the world.

In 2003 there were about 42,000 road-related fatalities and about three million injuries. In this same year there were 622 cyclist-related deaths and 46,000 cyclist-related injuries. (The injuries are probably unreported). There were 4749 pedestrian fatalities and about 70,000 injuries.

The available statistics seem to be rather heavily slanted towards counting victims instead of perpetrators. However, it seems reasonable to assume that almost all of the motorist fatalities and injuries involve other motorists. There are also allegations that, at least in New York City, drivers are at fault for 90% of the cyclist and pedestrian deaths.

To put it simply, the danger on our roads arise from motorists--not pedestrians and cyclists. This blame-the-victim attitude is getting rather tedious. What if your sheriff excused a lynching, explaining that African-Americans who move into white neighborhoods should have known it was dangerous?

(By the way, I'm not saying there aren't stupid pedestrians and cyclists. Heavens, over half of all bicycle accidents don't even involve the assistance of a second party, but the numbers are pretty clear: motorists are the problem here.)

Have I gotten your attention? OK, I'll let Bob Mionske take over from here...

Cars Are the New Smoking

2008-04-15T18:14:00.000-07:00

I remember about 25 years ago it was considered acceptable to smoke just about anywhere except a movie theater or a doctor's office.

Today I read an interesting article from Jonathan Maus, titled Cars are Second-Class Citizens (hey, it was United Airlines that said it, Jonathan was just quoting). At the end of Jonathan's article, he says his new "mantra" is,

Cars are the new smoking

Yeah, I get it.

Saturday I took a ride with a dear friend who's active professionally in the Portland bicycle community. She was talking about a new chain lubricant that was based on soybean oil--though, as she laments, it was all genetically modified soybeans.

"So, uhh, what's the benefit of soybean oil?"

"It's not petroleum."

I think for a moment. "I'm not against petroleum, it's burning it that's stupid."

I did a rough calculation. Assuming I oiled my chain every hundred miles (which I will freely admit I don't always do), that I ride 7500 miles a year, and I use 0.25 fluid ounces of oil every time I lube my chain (which might be a bit excessive), I calculate that a gallon of chain lube would last me 51,000 miles, or about 7 years. A gallon of gasoline lasts at most, what, 60 miles, or about one hour?

Think about it.

Spring is Here, finally...

2008-04-11T12:27:00.000-07:00

It's been a slow progression. First I switched to the lighter booties. Then I switched to thinner full-finger gloves. And, today, I switched to cycling sandals and left my rain jacket at home, leaving only my windbreaker.

On the way to work there are two different places where a male robin always flies low across my path. Only...it's always the same place. Sigh. As a cerebral predator, I know what that means!

Today is sunny, high is already in the low sixties. "Today is a good day to ride!" (Visualize the voice, inflection, and emphasis of Whorf in Star Trek: The Next Generation.)

Seriously, I wonder if a lot of people don't ride because they're...well, afraid of the weather. Reality check: it was 50 degrees when I left the house this morning, and I was perfectly comfortable.

Even in the worst weather, I am never really uncomfortable. Yes, my face may get wet, but the rest of my body remains dry. Yes, it feels a bit chilly for the first few minutes when I start out, but after that I'm perfectly fine. (I found out the hard way that if I'm warm when I start out, I'm roasting before I've even finished warming up.)

On insanely long rides, I can have trouble with my feet. Some of this is just me: I just have cold feet. I wear socks when I sleep at night, so that should be a clue. Also, if it's raining, after a while, your feet will get wet. My friend has invested a tremendous amount of effort (and gear) trying to get around this, but I believe her current solution is simply to change socks periodically during a long ride.

If you're considering getting into riding, I would recommend starting as a fair weather rider, and then budget some money to try to slightly extend your riding season as the weather shuts down. Next year you can start riding a little earlier, and then invest a little more so you can ride a little later. After a while, the theory is perhaps you won't have to stop riding.

What should you plan on getting? Wow, that's a tough one. I could give you advice, but it would be highly tailored for riding in the northern Willamette Valley, tempered for the fact that I tend to ride warmer than most of my friends.

I think most of us have acquired a lot of our gear through simple trial and error. You can bypass some of that if you can find riding friends and get some advice from them about what works. I'm hedging like this, because it depends so much on your riding environment. If you live in Phoenix, Arizona, the Showers Pass jacket is probably overkill. I know that the Pearl Izumi Amphib gloves are too warm for anything except perhaps snow riding, which doesn't happen very darn often here. And so forth. Trust me, though, that cyclist you see several mornings a week on your commute has it figured out: next time, examine what she's wearing closely, and if you aren't clear, just ask. Cyclists are a friendly bunch.

Nice Bike Shorts!

2008-04-09T15:21:00.000-07:00

[update 2008-04-15. State Farm has pulled the ad. Old cowboy proverb: when you find you're digging yourself into a hole, the first thing you should do is stop digging. Kudos to them, if a bit late.]

Right. Unh-huh. I like what they said here:

Yeah, he's dressed like a freak but he is also extremely fit, athletic and healthy. Sheila's teasing him, but that's because she thinks Jim is hot. The idea flickers across your medial prefrontal cortex, that part of the brain the neuromarketers are always trying to get to: "Hey, maybe I could get fit and healthy by biking to work like Jim. For $369 a year and whatever gas money I'd save by not driving I could buy a really nice bike."

It makes me want to publish a 30-second ad of an obese emphysemic shoving an oxygen tank into the car, turning to the camera, saying

State Farm loves it when you drive. Don't you want to be like me?

Hold the Weasels Accountable

2008-04-07T16:28:00.001-07:00

As reported by bikeportland.org...

I know this is old news, but did anyone catch the irony that Patrick McHenry is overweight and represents a state that is a stronghold of plantation drug lords (tobacco)?

Birkenfeld Brevet 2008

2008-04-06T09:45:00.000-07:00

My Birkenfeld Brevet pictures were actually from the "pre-ride", taken before the actual event, which is both a responsibility and privilege of being a volunteer. The actual volunteering occurred yesterday.

We had about forty enthusiastic riders ready to ride in chilly but above freezing conditions. There was a light sprinkling as people checked in, but not enough for anyone except us volunteers with the paperwork to notice.

We gave the pre-ride announcements a little bit too early, so the riders had another couple of minutes to wait before the official starting time of 7 AM.

After we packed up the starting booth, we all rode up to Vernonia to set up the rest area. We chose to follow the riders' route in order to get some pictures. Most of my pictures hanging out the passenger window of Lynne's car didn't turn out, but there were a couple of decent ones.

In Vernonia, we set up in the shelter and started heating water. The first crew (pictured here) dropped by very shortly therafter. They were really fast! 10 mph doesn't seem very fast when you're in a car, but when you're climbing up to Vernonia, that's pretty impressive.

One asked when the control was opened (you aren't allowed to come too early). When he heard it had opened seven minutes earlier, he exclaimed, "We're late! Let's get going!"

But seriously, it was great getting to see and talk to all of the riders and volunteers.

After the last rider came through, we packed up and went back to Grand Lodge. Lynne and I warmed up in the soaking pool (it's cold out there if you aren't riding a bike), and then spent the remainder of the afternoon in the Round Room greeting riders as they came in.

Beth came by and we had a terrific time discussing bikes, the weather, and training plans.

It appears there was one abandon (he never called, but his riding partners reported it). Everyone else finished without incident. The weather got progressively wetter as the day went on. A number of the riders who came in were a mute testament to the virtues of fenders and mudguards in the Pacific Northwet.

The pictures I felt worth uploading are here. I haven't tried my hand at organizing one of these events, but volunteering is almost as fun as riding 124.2 miles. Don't hesitate to help out when you get a chance!

Let's Burn Our Food, Shall We?

2008-04-04T20:08:00.000-07:00

Today's business section reports that corn prices have jumped 30 percent.

This on top of a news report recently that indicates that the price of rice has skyrocketed in the last year.

And finally, Joshua Lederles wrote today that corn production is spreading the dead zone in the Gulf of Mexico.

The articles all ascribe the issue to the increased production of biofuels. Before I continue, permit me to point out that the carbon footprint of 35,000 Kcal (1 gallon of gas) is going to the same (or possibly slightly worse; petroleum is amazingly efficient) for biofuel as it is for petrofuel. So, either way, if we don't change our transportation habits, we're going to poison the planet.

The question thus remains, shall we starve as we poison the planet, or not? When Bush says he wants to reduce dependence on foreign oil, he's still missing the fundamental issue: our transportation-based economy and life style will not continue indefinitely.

Yeah, I know, Lynne, here I am on the soap box again. At least I kept it short.

Cartoons and Social Responsibility

2008-04-03T11:03:00.001-07:00

My aunt asked me if I do the cartoons you see on the blog. Sigh, no way. My favorite cartoons come from Neil Skorpen, Andy Singer, and the occasional beauty from Jeff Mallett (like above). Since this all published artwork, I'm linking to their art instead of republishing it. This also means that the links could die. Ah, c'est la vie. I have hundreds of these as screen savers, and as I find ones I like (that are currently published), I'll add them as time allows. Oh, heck, here are a few more...

Be sure to check out the rest of the work of these artists; they're truly fun.

Anyway, I get a ping from a robot at facebook saying that my daughter's ex-boyfriend had mentioned me in a blog entry.

I went to look at it, and it appears that he had a bit of free time and went on a comfortable long ride across the city (Vancouver). He noted how pleasant it is to ride your bike (the endorphin high and all), and says that he's going to name his bike "Jason".

I told my family about this, and said that I wasn't sure how to take it. Rachel: "I'd go with creeped out". Yeah, well, that's why he's her ex boyfriend .

Seriously, I guess I'm at the point in life where I want to leave a legacy: mentor someone to write better software, get someone to turn off their television set and get some exercise, or just plain make the world a better place for my children and grandchildren. I do think this is a function of age. I look at my kids in their 20's and I can relate to how I was at that age: "we are only immortal for a limited time" as the song by Rush goes.

I've seen some interesting speculation in the last couple of years about longevity (or even immortality) and its impact on the individual. L.E. Modesitt, Jr. suggests that even with near miraculous technology (nanites and the like), "no one lives forever--there's always the freak accident." Kind of sobering to think that the daily activities we take for granted (taking a shower or swallowing food) could, in the aggregate, be the proximal cause of one's demise when other factors (such as heart disease and cancer) are removed.

Another author wrote a fairly forgettable novel wherein well-to-do individuals could elect to undergo a rejuvenation process, and most elected to thereafter wear an earring that marked them as rejuvenated. "The young are so callow", one says, explaining why she preferred individuals of her own generation.

Then, of course, there is the current wave of supernatural fiction, where some writers try to give a sense of what it must be like for those people who live extended life spans.

Anyway, I'm beginning to see that the emotional and intellectual viewpoint of people change as they age, and in odd and surprising ways. I think that if someone lived for hundreds of years, their outlook would be, well, inhuman.

OK, back to play with people my own age. Take care...

Birkenfeld Brevet 2008 post-pre-ride

2008-04-01T09:39:00.001-07:00

This coming Saturday is the annual Oregon Randonneurs Birkenfeld Brevet. Part of organizing a ride like this is to send a couple of fools down a week before to find out what the course is like. All four of us had planned to ride this on Saturday but the weather was...well..uncooperative.

Andrew and Cecil chose to ride on Sunday. Lynne and I both had weekend commitments but felt that a) we could afford a weekday to ride, and b) waiting another day might improve the weather slightly.

This time of year the starting time of 7 AM means that you will want blinkies and reflective gear for at least the first part of the ride. Although we had plenty of sun before we made it to Gales Creek, notice how the flash on my camera went off and really trashed Lynne's pre-ride photo here.

The ride starts out of McMenamins Grand Lodge and heads west then north out of Forest Grove. Motorists in this part of the world are pretty polite, though you need to be concerned due to the early hour of the morning. Did you know experts say that you really aren't awake for as much as an hour after you get up?

One thing that doesn't change is the terrain. It seems like the entire route from the edge of Forest Grove to SR-6 is a slight uphill. In spite of that, the emerging sun gives you some tremendous vistas of rural western Oregon. Don't forget to look to take a look! I've lived in Oregon almost 30 years, and I still don't get tired of the beautiful interplay of clouds, hills, and sun. Here you see rain clouds and snow capped hills to the west

Snow capped. Uh, yeah, right. More on that in moment.

When you make it out to SR-6 (the "Wilson River Highway"), you have the short leg up past Glenwood to the Timber Road junction. When we road this section, not only did we have rumble strips on the shoulder, but the shoulder itself is extremely dirty. Be careful, especially if you need to hop into the murder vehicle lane to avoid trash (those rumble strips are pretty rough when you're on a bicycle).

The turnoff onto Timber Road was approximately 0.5 miles earlier than indicated on the cue sheet, and this discrepancy stayed pretty constant for me for the remainder of the ride. Or, as they say, "your mileage may vary".

As you start to rise on Timber Road, you may discover that the road surface is heavily sanded and graveled. On our return in the afternoon, we saw that Washington County and come through and (sort of) swept the roadway. However, I wouldn't be surprised if there's more crud on the road by the time Saturday rolls around.

Uhh..Oh yes...about that snow. Folks in the upper reaches of the Tualatin Mountains have noted snow just about every morning every last week, and as the store clerk at the Birkenfeld Grocery put, "it could stop any time now."

As we climbed, we saw a light dusting, but the road surface was quite manageable. However, if we continue to subfreezing overnight temperatures, be extremely cautious of black ice on this stretch; it is heavily shaded and protected from winds, so the potential exists for very treacherous traction here.

After about a mile of clear cuts (legacy of Ronald Reagan and George Bush the First), you (essentially) summit. I essentially because there's actually a slight bit of climbing on the far side of Timber before you drop down to US-26.

A political aside: Reagan and Bush so thoroughly raped the Pacific Northwest that we actually have less old growth forest left than places in the east such as the Catskills, Adirondacks, or the Blue Ridge. All you have to do is to use an airplane or get away from the freeways and US highways and you'll see what my grandchildren will get to enjoy until they're my age.

Ah well. Back to the ride. Be careful on your downwards descent into Timber. On top of sketchy ice conditions and the potential for sand and gravel, you have a steep downhill right before the train crossing, and the train crossing is really bad. Lynne walked her bike over it; I just picked my path carefully (1970's technology 27 by 1.25" tires have their uses).

Don't blink as you pass through Timber. It's small, but it really does have a bit of charm. You have two sharp hairpins past the railroad tracks, a slight climb, and then you get to start your downhill paycheck.

After about a mile and a half, the clear cuts stop (because you're getting close to US-26 and we wouldn't want the tree huggers in Portland to know what's going on, would we?). Another mile and a half and you cross straight over on Timber Road and continue north/northeast towards Vernonia.

It's along here that you start paralleling the course of the Nehalem River. Recall there was a flood that was on the national news last fall. The formaldehyde trailers are in place now, but if you look closely you can still see the occasional screen door or other household debris above your head in the trees next to the river.

It was about here that I was grateful that we hadn't ridden on Saturday or Sunday. The weather was definitely better than either of the previous days, but we still ended up with the weirdest precipitation. Seriously, it snowed on us once and hailed on us twice, but not once the entire day did we actually get wet.

The road surface was marginally better here than south of US-26, but pay close attention around mile 32. There is a "rough road" sign, and this means you. You have about 30 feet where the road has been just plain totaled. It looks a lot like some drainage problems that will need the summer in order to correct.

As we turned north onto SR-47, Lynne and I had the bright idea that we'd try the Banks-Vernonia Trail, which has ready access along there. We took the first access road, went a tenth of mile, and then came across a "bridge closed" sign. Whoops, no. Back to the murder vehicle lane. Lynne tried again a quarter mile later and we immediately found an entire section of the pavement that had gratuitously slid about 15 feet to the right off of its bed.

Bottom line: don't bother, just stay on SR-47.

A note about SR-47. At this point I've ridden most sections of Columbia, Washington, and Yamhill counties, a large part of Marion and eastern Multnomah counties, and even chunks of Polk, Tillamook, Lane, and Clark County Washington. However, SR-47 is the one of the few places I've ridden where murderists have thrown trash at me, screamed epithets at me, and tried to run me off the road. And that trash throwing incident? That was in Vernonia. Be careful. If that wasn't enough, there were an astounding number of log trucks on the road as we did this ride on a Monday. I think it's a bit lighter on weekends, and log truck drivers as a lot are pretty careful, but at least one log truck murderist underestimated the length of his truck and cut back over into our lane a bit too early.

We didn't have the tremendous problems that Cecil and Andrew did getting into Alexander Park in Vernonia. The road surface at the cutoff is indeed a bit rough, but certainly no worse than what you saw at mile 32 earlier.

As you head down Bridge Street you will see ample evidence of the flood. It's also starkly apparent which property owners had flood insurance (very new looking) and which ones didn't (flood damage, right along the main thoroughfares). Turn on State Street and start a bit of gratuitous climbing, and be sure to answer your control question at Burn Road and turn back.

Make a left on Stony Point Road and start some more climbing. It's actually rather pretty here, in an almost rural kind of way. However, this is where we started seeing the dogs. Lots of dogs. Who have more enthusiasm than common sense. Lynne might characterize them differently, but I didn't see any that were a serious threat, except for the basic lack of any sense of self preservation that a dog gets when it's chasing. One of these could collide with you just out of canine stupidity as you go by, so I recommend either speeding up so that don't get that opportunity, or slowing down to the point that they cotton to the fact that instead of prey, you are in fact a human. Like I said, all the dogs I saw were of the tail-wagging "let's chase the fast moving prey thing" variety, not genuine threats (which do exist, unfortunately). You know: growling, tail down, follows you past their property line, looking for a place to latch the teeth onto. I really didn't see any of those on this ride.

At the tee turn left (north) on SR-47 and follow the Nehalem all the way out to Birkenfeld.

It looks like the single-lane road sections with traffic lights (where they were rebuilding the bridges) are finished. If you're an urban commuter like me, you'll still find yourself automatically changing lane position to hit the defunct sensor loops as you go by.

You'll know when you're close to the turnaround because of the church. The sign made this randonneur "gimme" picture (sorry).

The Birkenfeld General Store is definitely the hotbed of activity in this part of the world. Need a big game tag? Need to load up on bourbon or vodka? Want to know when the next A.B.A.T.E. poker run is? Want a grilled cheese sandwich or an espresso? It's all here. Everyone who came into the store seemed to know each other by name, and I think I saw one person come in and leave with a loaf of bread without money change hands (credit at a grocery store? Shades of the 1950's...) You can even buy a T-shirt or a sweatshirt with the company's name and logo. It certainly has a following.

The return is pretty much a straight shot back to Forest Grove. Of course, you're following the Nehalem upstream now, so be prepared to work a bit trying to get back to Vernonia. When you pass Stony Point Road (and continue straight), beware of more happy dogs on the right. The stretch of Timber Road leading to US-26 is stultifying. I guess the snow and hail kept me distracted the first time.

Heading back up to Timber, don't despair. You're at a higher elevation than when you were climbing up from SR-6, so the three miles really isn't that bad.

After you summit past the railroad tracks, do not take a carefree paycheck back down to the Wilson River Highway. Although you probably won't encounter black ice this late in the day, I saw more than a few stretches of road that were only clear in the double tracks left by the passing murderists. Also, you have sharp turns through exactly those same places that have been heavily sanded, so you run a real risk of losing traction or risking your life in the oncoming lane if you hit them too fast. Just don't overrun your sight clearance, pick your entry speed, and--instead of picking an apex--expect to hold your line and to find one or two pieces of gravel in whatever tire track you're in as you enter the corner. (If you don't understand that, it's motorcycle talk. Lynne calls me "Whacko Boy Junior" because the only rider she normally rides with me who's faster on the downhills, Don "Whacko Boy" Bolton, is also an ex motorcyclist).

It's downhill to the Glenwood open control, but don't forget to stop and get your brevet card signed (or a receipt). From there, you'll feel like George Hincapie as you fly down Gales Creek Road and then back to Grand Lodge. Be sure to bring along your swimsuit; for a $5 charge (waived if you have dinner) you can soak in their Japanese style soaking pool. And, you will have dinner with us, won't you?

See you there!

The few photos I didn't work into this ride report are here.
Also, check out Lynne's photos.

Music: If Only She Woulda (Frank Zappa, You Are What You Is)

The High Price of Bullets

2008-03-28T19:07:00.000-07:00

I just read today that the U.S. is expected to pay $440 billion for oil imports in 2008. To contrast, our national trade deficit last year was about $700 billion. Wow, over half of our trade imbalance is based on our lust to pollute the earth.

I alse heard that 40% of our oil imports comes from terrorist countries.

Let's see...40%...So, for every $20 you spend on gas, $8 goes to a terrorist. At $40 for a box of 50, that means you just bought enough bullets for a terrorist to kill 10 American soldiers.

Think about it.

View of California (from the North)

2008-03-28T12:43:00.001-07:00

My favorite part of this is how there is no sidewalk on the other side of the street. If you thought this was humorous, check out the rest of it for a real downer. And you want to know why we Oregonians make fun of Californians.

Hey, Nice Pedestrian Bridge!

2008-03-28T12:27:00.000-07:00

From the League of American Bicyclists:

Want to Cross the Delaware River? Leave Your Bike at Home.

Reconstruction of the Milford-Montague Bridge across the Delaware has failed to accommodate bicyclists, leaving local riders with a lengthy detour. The “oversight” by the Delaware River Joint Toll Bridge Commission has been getting worse: riders trying to cross in the travel lane have been harassed by Commission employees and a portable sign now warns that “no bicyclists are allowed” on the bridge. If you are in the area…give the Commission a call at 888-203-7690. And, even if you’re not…it could happen to a bridge near you sometime, so why not give them a call anyway?!

So, they build themselves a bridge upon which it is not safe for motorists to use. Obvious solution: ban potential victims instead of the people who are behaving dangerously. Right. Even the LAB doesn't get it right: the bridge failed to accomodate motorists. That's pretty obvious, at least to me! Here's how the article should have been written:

Reconstruction of the Milford-Montague Bridge across the Delaware has failed to accommodate motorists, leaving them with a lengthy detour. The “oversight” by the Delaware River Joint Toll Bridge Commission has been getting worse: motorists are harassing Commission employees, and a temporary barricade now warns that “no motor vehicles are allowed” on the bridge. Commission officials are contemplating their next steps: to either repair or replace the new bridge when it has just been placed into service.

Of Course We Want to Drive!

2008-03-28T08:38:00.000-07:00

OK, let's start by angering you.

Now for my two cents. There is the fundamental presumption on the part of traffic engineers that single-occupant motor vehicles are the standard, the norm, and the priority for their design targets.

This has become a self-fulfilling vision. If we want to see this changed, we frankly need to make an overt attempt on public policy to discourage it. Things like the referenced article confirm me in the thinking that we need to get motorists to reconsider their reasons for driving.

Keep in mind when you read my suggestions that, by a "car", I refer to non-commercial non-special use vehicles. I particularly exclude service vehicles, emergency vehicles, and commercial vehicles (those with apportioned mileage and taxation rates). I intend reasonable exemptions for businesses, the handicapped, and other uses that are clearly in the interest of public policy...

Withhold all highway funding from jurisdictions that do not make safety a priority that supersedes convenience or efficiency.
If an urban road does not have one sidewalk and two bike lanes, remove motor vehicle lanes until it does, even if this means making it one way or single lane with vehicle turnouts.
If a traffic jurisdiction concludes that a road is unsafe for motorists to share with bicyclists and pedestrians, block the road to motorists (who are the ones who typically cause the injuries) instead of the legitimate road users.
If a traffic light does not properly sense bicycles, modify it so that it does not sense motor vehicles either. Set the timing so that a motorist will have time to leave his car, cross lanes of traffic, push the inconveniently placed button, cross lanes against traffic, and then reenter his car.
Set a nationwide speed limit of 35 mph for cars. Not only will this reduce fuel consumption and pollution, it will save lives. Note that trucks and service vehicles are exempt from this. If you want to get there faster, take a bus.
Stop handing out car titles with a security interest. If you want a car, you buy it.
Individuals that "deal" (defined in Oregon, for instance, as anyone who sells more than eight cars per year) will be required to perform 200 hours of community service per year. Motorists convicted of traffic offenses will be required to perform some amount of community service in increments of 8 hours. The idea here is to make people who sell or operate cars get the idea that they're doing something wrong.
If you commit a traffic crime (such as DUI or reckless driving), the car you are operating as well as any others with your name on the title will be seized and destroyed. I say "destroyed" as opposed to resold, because it is clearly public policy to reduce the number of cars on the road.
Traveling at a speed greater than 50 mph is a traffic crime, since you are providing material aid and support to the enemy on the War on Terror (see above).

Yes, I know, some of them are tongue-in-cheek. But...

35 Pounds

2008-03-24T18:18:00.001-07:00

Just so you don't assume that I ride a lighter-than-a-gnat's fart bicycle for my daily errands, here's my pimpin' ride.

In addition to full mudguards (with water bottle mud flaps), it has a rear rack, a tail bag, a huge 3 pound U-lock with a cable, three tail lights, and three headlights (including one with a 2 pound battery). The bike itself is a height-of 1970's Japanese steel frame with gen-yoo-wine 27" by 1.25" wheels.

The drive train is probably the newest thing on it; I upgraded it from the original ten speed to a 21 speed, courtesy of a friend of mine whose similar vintage bicycle decided to implode on a country road about year ago (unfortunately, while she was on it.)

The beauty about having a modest bicycle is that it doesn't have "steal me!" written all over it.

And hey, all that weight builds character. Yeah, right, that's the ticket. That's what I keep telling myself...

900 Miles Per Gallon?

2008-03-20T11:19:00.000-07:00

WashCo BTC MARKETING IS HERE TO TELL YOU HOW YOU CAN OWN THE 900 mpg VEHICLE.

"There must be some sort of trick," you're asking.

Not at all! The 900 mile-per-gallon vehicle really does offer:

900 Miles per
gallon on inexpensive fuel available everywhere!

Now, folks, the 900 mile-per-gallon vehicle consists of two parts:

The chassis, and when I say "the chassis", I mean not just the frame, but all the parts and accessories that go on the frame, including the wheels, tires, brakes, seats and steering, cargo compartment, and cup holder, and
The engine.

The secret is in the engine, but before we get to that, let's talk a little about the amazing range of chassis and accessories you can find on the 900-mile-per-gallon vehicle.

The chassis is available in a wide range of prices and styles and it comes with a terrific range of accessories.

The price range is truly fantastic. You can purchase a chassis for as little as $5 or you can spend up to $5000 on a high-end luxury model. It's a lot like choosing between a used Yugo to a new Mercedes, except you can't find even a used Yugo for $5, and you certainly can't find a new Mercedes for $5000, so the 900 mpg vehicle is much less expensive to purchase than a regular car. In fact, you may already own a usable one.

OK, so now you know a little about the chassis of the 900 mpg vehicle. A little later I'll tell you where and how to purchase one—information you won't find anywhere else! But first we need to talk about the real secret ofthe 900 mpg vehicle:

The Engine:

It's not available in any store!
Due to an obscure 1865 constitutional amendment, it's not available for sale anywhere in the US!
However, most people already have a suitable engine. Your family may have several! It just needs to be tuned up!

That's why we're here... to tell you how!

We'll get back to the chassis in a minute, but first some more about the engine:

It doesn't come with a warranty. (After all, who would offer you a warranty, since there's no
seller?)The engine has a 75 year average lifetime (often even 50% more! and it works better the more you use it!
It's low pollution.

Isn't that great!?

Look at the amazing advantages of the 900 mpg vehicle:

It's small and light--it can even be shipped by air freight.
It goes almost everywhere--even places 4-wheel drives can't.
It is inexpensive to maintain (even the tires cost less than $20 apiece).
There's a wide range of accessories available. You can even purchase extra cargo space or extra seats--just like a minivan.
It's America's most popular recreational vehicle.
The 900 mpg vehicle actually saves everybody money because it needs smaller lanes and causes no road damage. That makes everybody's takes less. Imagine: your neighbor can save you money by using the 900 mpg vehicle!
It's the ideal commuting vehicle; you'll actually enjoy commuting to and from work with the 900 mpg vehicle.
It's safe: about the same injury-accident rate per hour or per mile of operation as an automobile--if you know how to use it.
You can park it almost anywhere!

Now to be perfectly honest (have I ever lied to you?), I'm going to tell you about the disadvantages of the 900 mpg vehicle:

It has a relatively low top speed. (but its average speed is about the same as the average speed on L.A. freeways).
It's not really the best vehicle for long trips (though lots of people have taken coast-to-coast vacations with them).
It's not really the best vehicle for use in freezing or wet weather (though many people do use them).

BUT THERE’S MORE!

Here are some things I'll bet you haven't thought about:

The average trip in the U.S. is less two (2) miles! So, you really don't need a very fast
vehicle or a long distance vehicle for most trips.
If most people used our 900 mpg vehicles for just the short trips, traffic congestion would disappear! The air would be cleaner! And it would be a whole lot quieter and safer for our children.

OK, so now you're wondering, "What is he selling," and "What is it gonna cost?"

We're not selling hardware.
We're not selling supplies.
We're not selling vitamins or minerals.
We're only selling an idea, and it's

Absolutely
Free!!

All we ask is the same thing that every multi-level marketing organization asks: that you tell other folks about the great things you've learned from this show. We'll show you how to do that, and we'll show you how to join our organization and get all the benefits of our marketing plan.

But first, you have to find your engine and get it tuned up, and we have lots of free literature to help you do that. We also have free group get-togethers every Saturday morning to help you learn what you need to know to get the job done.

Isn't that amazing?

So what is this idea?

The CHASSIS of our 900 mpg vehicle is a BICYCLE, and the ENGINE is YOU.

We've got free literature to help you learn how to use this amazing vehicle and help you get your engine tuned up. We'll offer you personal advice and we're here to answer your questions.

We also consult with the city and county on bicycle issues and we lobby for appropriate bike facilities to make it easier for you to use your 900 mpg vehicle in Washington
County and the Portland Metro area.

All we ask is that you try it. If you like it, tell your friends. To help you do all of that, you can join our marketing organization for the unbelievably low price of just $25 per year. You heard me right! Not $5000, not $500, but a measly $25 per year.

But you'd better hurry, this offer won't last long. Look at what you'll get:

You'll get personal invitations to all our planning meeting, sent to you by either US
mail or electronic mail—both if you prefer!

You'll get our Saturday morning tune-up session schedule delivered the same way.

But that's not all!

You'll get our newsletter telling you what's going on in the 900 mpg vehicle world. We'll tell you where to take your vehicle for fun, what facilities the city and county are planning, and how you can help speed those plans along. We'll tell you what groups are planning organized rides and tell you about commercial tours. It's all right there!

But wait—there's more:

You'll get free classified ads in the newsletter and on our internationally acclaimed World Wide Web site to help you buy or sell 900 mpg equipment (no engines please).

And you'll get the support of other 900 mpg enthusiasts.

If you act now, you'll be sure to get our September/October schedule delivered to your door very soon.

So, line up, sign up, and join WashCo BTC today! You can join the BTC online!

All right, there's one nagging question left:

So how do we figure it's a 900 mpg vehicle?

This is the fine print, for the mathematically inclined.

We are comparing fuel economy between a motor vehicle and a human on a bicycle. Can we make it a fair comparison? We can if we can find a fuel that can (at least theoretically) power both a motor vehicle and a human. Naturally, it would be even better if the fuel really is a liquid. We're in luck, there is such a thing; it's vegetable oil!

Vegetable oil can readily be used as a fuel for small diesel engines. Remember the story about the guy who ran his Volkswagen Rabbit on used McDonald's French-fry oil? There a more recent story about a Joshua and Kaia Tickell who are traveling around the country in their Winnebago powered by used Long John Silver's frying oil. (A fishy story if I ever heard one.)

Now that we have a comparable fuel for both humans and cars, all we have to do is figure out how far someone can ride a bike on a gallon of oil.

An exercise table suggests that an average person burns about 600 food calories (Kcal) per hour when he rides a bicycle at 16 miles per hour. (Note: 16 mph is not very fast; almost anyone can ride a bicycle all day at that speed. Racers can easily average 25 mph.) That means that a commuting
bicyclist burns

(600 Kcal/hr) /(16 miles/hr)  =  37.5 Kcal/mile.

How many Kcal are in a gallon of vegetable oil? That’s easy! Fat is 9 kCal per gram, and there are about 3785 ml per gallon (assuming about 1 gram per ml), so the energy content in a gallon is

(3785 g) * (9 Kcal/g) = 34,000 Kcal,

Note that published figures for the energy content of gasoline are around 34,000 to 35,000 Kcal/gallon, so our calculation is in the same ballpark as the estimates given by other sources.

Finally, we divide the energy content of a gallon with the energy required to go one mile to get our miles per gallon. A gallon of fuel will take a bicycle

(34,000 Kcal/gallon) / (37.5 Kcal/mile) = 906 miles/gallon!

Many thanks and original credits to Randy Hudson and all the good folk at Loveland Colorado P.E.D.A.L.

Reader's Digest: They Just Don't Get it

2008-03-19T17:06:00.000-07:00

OK, so I guess I have to start with a guilty admission: I enjoy reading RD . However, the latest issue really annoyed me (and no, not due to the endless advertisements of pharmaceuticals).

First, they talk about how Canada and California are "aggressively" courting higher fuel economy standards, talking about raising "fleet" economy by oh, 50% sometime before you and I die.

Then, a few pages later, they write about a fellow who gets a whopping 150 mpg by practicing extreme conservation measures with is Toyota Prius.

Ummm....I've got news for you guys. VMT (Motor "vehicle miles travelled") has increased five fold over the last fifty years. In order to get back to mid-twentieth century consumption levels, we would have to increase "fleet" economy by more than five times, since there are many more vehicles on the road today.

Reality check number one: Americans are lazy. Go check out the Two Mile Challenge. 60% of our trips are two miles in distance or less. So, if we were willing to stop using the car for those stupid short trips, that would effectively reduce our VMT to 40% of its current levels.

Reality check number two: trading agricultural food acreage in favor of fuel is stupid. Not only is it a false economy, we've just changed our carbon footprint, not reduced it. Burning one kind of fuel instead of another still means that our grandchildren will starve due to lack of viable farmland.

I'm not a Luddite, but it seems like we've lost track of the importance of transportation for essential goods and services, and instead seem to think that it's our right to shove three thousand pounds by the Starbucks drive-through window. Less than 5% of our VMT is associated with essential goods and services and mass transit.

In World War 2, my grandparents survived on three gallons a week of gasoline. Have we really sunk so far that we can't acknowledge that we are at war again, with our environment, our ecology, and our freedom at stake? Remember, it's oil that made Bin Laden rich. Every time you fill your gas tank, you're paying Al Q'aida to kill US troops, making your home a little dirtier, and making the planet a little less hospitable for life.

So, how about it Clinton and Obama? Specify a ramping tax on registered and insured noncommercial non-farm vehicles. Start at $1000 per year in 2009, ramping up to $10,000 in 2019. Make it gradual so that the yuppies who live many leagues from their jobs will have time to adjust to the fact that their commute just got four times longer. Make it extreme so that it's clear to people that driving a car is a stupid thing to do. Specify exclusions for the handicapped and make sure that essential goods and services can be maintained, but set it up so that people who drive will eventually be regarded as selfish, and boorish (if not simply pitiable because they are handicapped).

Set a nationwide speed limit of 35 mph, like they had during the gas rationing days. Make it 15 mph for noncommercial non-service vehicles. The only way someone is going to stop driving their car is if they see a genuine benefit to using another mode to accomplish their errands. Make it slow enough and expensive enough, and they will opt for change.

What you choose to do does have an effect on those around you. Think about it.

David Feherty and Bicycling in Dallas

2008-03-17T13:29:00.000-07:00

OK. Let me get this straight. A motorist can't be bothered to slow down and wait while an oncoming vehicle passes, so that he can pass safely. Well, although this is sad and criminal state of affairs, as bicyclists we're unfortunately accustomed to seeing this.

BUT...the article almost makes it sound like it's OK that the trucker chose his own safety over the cyclist's. The mind boggles.

I guess it's easy for me to forget how nice I have it here in Portland. Other than that, I'm pretty much at a loss for words.

CBS Golf Analyst Struck by Truck

AP

Posted: 2008-03-16 22:46:56

ORLANDO, Fla. (March 15) -- Golf analyst David Feherty broke three ribs and punctured his lung when he was hit by a truck while riding his bicycle near his home in Dallas. He expects to be fully recovered in time for the Masters.

Photo Gallery

Sam Greenwood, Getty Images

Sports Figures
Surviving Crashes

1 of 11

CBS golf analyst David Feherty breaks three ribs and punctures his lung when he's hit by a truck while riding his bicycle, but expects to be fully recovered in time for the Masters. See some of the other top sports figures who have bounced back from scary accidents.

Feherty said Friday he was returning from his morning bicycle ride a day earlier when a truck hauling irrigation equipment pinched him into the curb and he was struck by the side mirror.

"He didn't want to hit the car on the left, so he ran over the cyclist on the right," Feherty said. "I don't remember a whole lot about it. There was a lady on the scene quickly, keeping me conscious. The next thing I know, I'm at Baylor Medical Center, the only hospital in the United States that doesn't have The Golf Channel."

He then asked who was leading the Arnold Palmer Invitational.

Feherty is regarded as golf's most comical TV analyst, a former European tour winner and Ryder Cup player from Northern Ireland who has been working for CBS Sports since 1997.

He has taken up cycling recently, and said last year after riding along 17 Mile Drive at Pebble Beach, "It's actually 28 miles." He has been injured a few dozen times riding his bike, but he described those accidents as "pilot error."

"That's when you hit the ground and slow down. This was flying through the air and speeding up," he said. "It was entirely different, and not near as much fun. I was lucky I didn't go underneath the trailer."

Feherty said he would be hospitalized for at least a few more days, and that he had a tube sticking out of his chest.

"But it's not as bad as it sounds," he said.

CBS Sports covered the PGA Tour during much of the West Coast swing and does not have another telecast until the Masters.

Snoos[z]eville and other excitement

2008-03-11T13:08:00.000-07:00

Saturday was the annual "Snoozeville Populaire" held by the Oregon Randonneurs. This 100km ride is ridiculously flat and a great way to get off of your arse in early March.

Complaint: the maps and the organizer call it "Snoozeville", but all of the maps and locals know the north end of Dairy Creek Road as "Snooseville." Ah well, the life of an OCD who can spell...

At 6:45 sharp Nate, Lynne and Cecil "hand you your helmet cheerfully" Anne showed up at my door. Lynne suggested that we follow my commute route for the first two miles. I smugly agreed, since I have a real cake-walk of a commute, with no busy streets and about 1 km through a park.

Not to say that the rest of the ride to Cornelius Pass Roadhouse was a problem. That early on a Saturday morning, the rid was pretty quiet and uneventful. The weather was well, nice. I know, 50's may not sound warm to you, but if you have some reasonable clothing and you're working on a bicycle, it's quite pleasant.

At 8:02 sharp, the group headed west towards Hillsboro. Cecil Anne took off like a woman on a mission, so I held with her for about half an hour. At that point, I asked her what her goldurn hurry was, and it turns out she was on a mission: she had her mother in town. Since I hadn't seen Lynne for a while, I dropped back for a couple of minutes until Lynne showed up, and then held with her for the rest of the ride.

The climb to Fern Flat Road (the first control) was just enough to keep me warm, since the sun wasn't out, and there's always a disproportionate temperature drop as you climb the oh, 600 feet or so to the top. (Note to Jason: nice place to visit on a hot summer day?) At Meacham's Corner we saw a sign reading in part, "lost steer". Uhhh...perhaps I left it with my cell phone?

As we grabbed food and water at the eastern paved end of Fern Flat, Lynne deliberated removing her jacket. As it turns out, that was a wise thing. One forgets just how much downhill there is coming back south. The entire 7.5 mile length of Dairy Creek is one very subtle incline. However, as we reached the flats towards the bottom, the sun came out, and I started feeling a bit warm.

On the far side of Frogger Junction (so named, because you feel like the amphibian in the computer game of the same name, as you have to cross US-26 without any sort of protection), we came across Susan France in a "secret control". I took the alternative to lose one of my layers, as the sun was profoundly shining at this point.

The ride through Banks was uneventful (no caltrops, tacks, or rednecks hurling beverages at us). Got the impression I don't trust that place? SR-47 is just simply vile for its entire length, and I don't care even to ride on it for a mile or two like we did.

Cedar Canyon is always a treat. Sure, it's got some hills, but the scenery is spectacular. (Oh, in all fairness, I should note that we had at least four very polite cars pass us there.) Lynne allowed as the western end of that road is actually known as "Killin Wetlands". Man, were the frogs busy. I read in the paper that it's a bumper crop of frogs this year (if frogs are part of your diet).

As we stopped at the information control at Jack Road, Andrew, Lance, and Amy came upon us and rode with us for a while. Andrew is annoyingly strong, even on his new recumbent, as we were climbing Stafford Road. Of course, when we hit the rollers after that, he was long gone.

As we passed through Kansas City, the Portland Velo "hammer and nails" crew passed us by. Hey...who was that wearing the iPod headphones. Humph. Lynne seemed to start hurting about now. I acted tough, but--truth be told--I was starting to feel the effects of not having done any long rides since the fall.

Maggie's Buns was a madhouse, with it seems like about the half the cyclists in Washington County stopping by. As the "open control", we all felt obliged to purchase something. Lynne and I split a cinnamon roll (still the size of one's head) and talked to Lance and Amy.

From this point we were kind of on automatic, because the return route from Forest Grove was pretty much the one Portland Velo follows. Except that, instead of turning off to go to Longbottom's Coffee Shop, you travel about another km to get back to McMenamin's.

We had a nice lunch with friends, a short visit by a yarn shop Lynne wanted to visit, and then home. Approximately 80 miles, averaged just under 14 mph, which is pretty respectable seeing as I was riding a bike about the size and weight of a Chevy Suburban.

Sunday morning came way too early, seeing as it was the daylight savings time change. I rolled up to Lynne and Fitz's house around 7:30 and then we carpooled over to Madison's Grill, where we spent a full day in a first aid class.

Seeing as the last time I was first-aid certified I was dodging pterodactyls, I felt it was time to refresh my background. This was an amazingly valuable class. Yes, chances are I won't ever need this information, or I'll only use it once or twice. Still, it's one of those things that everyone should know, up their with naming the major muscle groups and the basics of nutrition.

It was also a fun class with plenty of humor. We got to wrap Carlo DeLumpa up like a burrito, and Mike Mulligan gave us the straight story of his accident at the Portland Velo barbecue and ride last summer: on a downhill before one of those annoying and gratuitous hard left turns you get out here, his front wheel locked up. He let go of the brake, and then he didn't have enough remaining time/space to finish braking. He had an instant choice of going down on the pavement or in the field in front of him. Grass sounded like a better bet; the three foot ditch between him and the grass was the surprise. He went over the handlebars and landed on his head/back.

Lying there, he immediately surmised that a) he could move his fingers and toes, and b) his neck hurt like hell. For those of you who don't know the rest of the story, he had a broken neck and a broken back. He's completely ambulatory, doing lots of physical therapy, and expects a full recovery. Note that Mike Mulligan works with the company that gave our class; how's that for delightful irony!

Sunday night I was exhausted, yet again, and the week has been largely comprised of an IV drip of coffee at my side as I attempt to deal with the time change.

Four Months of Commuting...

2008-03-04T19:36:00.000-08:00

Saturday was not a ride day for me. As a board member of the Washington County BTC, I was obliged to make an appearance at Kissler's Bikes Saturday morning. The owner has made a gift of his capital equipment (fixtures, tools, even a trailer!) to the BTC. Susan Otcenas has been gracious enough to provide us temporary storage for a few months until we manage to get a cycling center open. The only catch: getting all that stuff from here to there.

So...I biked over to Kissler's and helped load up trucks and trailers, then drove Hal's van out to Susan's where we unloaded. After I got back to Kissler's I loaded up, put on my rain gear, and then went down to the local Free Range Tofu supermarket to pick up some things for dinner. (Rachel only eats happy granola-eating animals that practice yoga after their massage every day.) I got dumped on with one of the few major showers of the day.

But...as I was returning home with a back pack full of flour, meat, wine, and other items for dinner, it hit me. After four months, the rain isn't as wet, the wind isn't as foul, and the hills aren't as steep. It just seems right now, for me to use my bicycle when I commute. It seems downright wasteful to take a trip of only three or six miles in a car.

Add to that the realization that it was costing me about $5 every day in insurance and preventative maintenance just to have my car sitting in my driveway. Hey...you mean I can get paid to lose weight, keep my blood pressure down, stay happy, and fight global warming?

How can I make this message clearer?

Current music: Shine by Edenbridge.

Coming Out of Hibernation?

2008-02-24T12:23:00.000-08:00

Just a quick update. The last two months have been pretty tough, with a cataract surgery and my very first roto-rooter job (colonoscopy). Oh, and did I mention I'm now a board member of a local nonprofit?

On the plus side, I figure I've done about 1000 miles of bike commuting on my beloved Winter Wreck. I call it my "winter wreck" because it's the bike set up to ride in the winter: mud guards, rear rack, lights, and--most importantly--it's less expensive, so I don't mind that it's constantly exposed to all that grit and moisture.

Anyway, we've gotten a spell of nice weather here, for a change, so I decided to take my beloved carbon-Ti bike on yesterday's club ride. The first surprise was when I pulled it off of the hooks in the garage: I nearly threw it in the air because it was so light. Pumped up the tires...hmmm...only 40 pounds in there (I ride with 110). Guess I haven't ridden it in a while!

Lynne met me on her bike at my door around 9:15 and we set off to Longbottom's, where the club starts the ride. I immediately noticed that it seems to take nothing to accelerate the bike. I'd stomp on the pedals when the light turned green, and it felt like I was being flicked like a booger.

Portland Velo's route was a pretty flat loop through the farmlands south of Hillsboro, which suited me fine; after doing very little more than commuting back and forth, I didn't feel like doing a lot of climbing. The other thing about climbing around here is that it tends to put you in wooded (shaded) areas, and the sun felt just wonderful. It quickly rose to over 50 degrees with bright sun. I was wearing black, so it felt very nice to be outside.

Down towards Bald Peak we skirted the mountain without actually doing a lot of climbing, and this is where my next surprise came. My Lemond Victoire is one of the stiffest bikes I've ever ridden (that was a surprise when I got it, but I'm still in love with it...). Anyway, stiff translates into fast on the downhills, and I'm used to being one of the first riders to hid the bottom of a hill. (Don Bolton is faster, but he's arguably got more years of motorcycle riding than I have.)

So...when three or four of these guys coasted past me to the bottom of the first hill, I was a little taken aback. OK, so I wasn't really trying that hard: upright, hands on the top, enjoying the gorgeous weather. The second time I was aero (hands on the drops, elbows and knees tucked, feet at 9 and 9 o'clock) and yet a few of the guys were in front of me. Now I was getting a bit curious.

The third time it happened I started to pay attention to what was going on, and then it hit me: these same guys were falling offf behind me as we ascended the next hill! A-HAH! Jason, you just might be getting your weight problem under control! I guess bike commuting all winter has paid off in more than one way.

In any event, this is my first entry into (hopefully) reviving this blog. Family, pictures, and what's generally occupying my life will follow. Take care!